Mel Gibson Has Been Sober For 3 Years And Feels Sorry For Tiger Woods
Mel Gibson gave an interview to the Daily Mail. As you know I love the Daily Mail, but most celebrities shy away from it. He must really want his new movie to do well and is giving interviews to everyone. Hell, I here he has shirts he hands out that say, "I got your sugar tits right here." No, not true, but it would be slightly humorous if he did.
Oh, before I get into the interview he gave did you see that he bribed Mexican officials with some kind of $1M grant or something and got them to move thousands of prisoners from a jail to another jail so he could make his latest movie? Over the weekend it happened and the prisoners were moved to a jail that was really far away so their families couldn't visit. Why? So, Mel could make a movie.
Anyway, back to the interview. In it, Mel says he feels sorry for Tiger Woods. He says that Tiger is being used as a distraction so people don't focus on the war in Afghanistan.
"I feel sorry for Tiger Woods. Why are we talking about this when we're sending 30,000 more troops to Afghanistan? You've got this history-changing event going on and we're talking about Tiger's private life and golf injuries. He's being used as a diversion and it just drives me crazy."
Uh huh. So, let me get this straight. Back when Tiger got married, the government knew it would need a distraction sometime down the road so started lining up women who agreed to have sex with Tiger Woods and the government fed his sexual appetite and made him write all those fantasies he has about Derek Jeter. Then, right when the war is taken up a notch, they have their secret agent Elin who they recruited for this also smash Tiger's car and face with a golf club. It's brilliant. Mel, I don't know how you managed to uncover it, but it is brilliant.
It is especially brilliant considering he says he isn't drinking anymore. "It's been three-and-a-half years now (without alcohol). It's cool. But I put some time together before that - one time it was eight years, one time it was five years. I have to be vigilant about these things or it will creep back in."
Well, I don't believe him at all but you can choose to if you want. He also says that he effed up his marriage. No kidding. Being an ass and having sex with ugly Russian singers will do that to a marriage. It is a REALLY long interview. I got tired of his sanctimonious crap pretty early on, but stuck it out for all of you. I also couldn't use any of their pictures. They were too flattering and he doesn't deserve to be flattered.
