Golden Globe Snark
Last night I was suffering the effects of a very long weekend capped by six hours of football watching with my dad. Six hours of football watching with my dad goes something like this. Drinking and more drinking interspersed with yells when the channel surfing during commercials results in a late arrival back to the game. Needless to say, I was in no condition to watch any of the Golden Globes. One of my friends was texting me and her texts were so funny that I just decided to let her keep texting and I would doze until 24.
3:58pm - It's pretty dress time
3:59pm - Although it's raining on all the dresses and Louboutins!!
4:11pm - Colin Firth is wearing Tom Ford and I'm leaving my boyfriend for him the first chance I get.
4:22pm - I love Emily Blunt's dress. And Diane K looks beautiful of course.
4:30pm - (I had asked her to identify the best dressed when she first started texting) Just in my opinion Emily Blunt and someone named Lea Michele.
4:34pm - Drew would look gorgeous but there is a fungus growing out of her hip.
4:41pm - Christina Hendricks looks like a goddess. Mariah looks tacky as hell. Put your saggy boobs away for once.
4:45pm - George Clooney's girlfriend is beautiful. Gorgeous dress. Too bad about the arm band tattoo. You can't take the trash out of the girl.
5:02pm - Ricky G equals funny and can I just say how ridiculous it was for Nicole Kidman to talk about wearing a ribbon for Haiti. It just seems all so self righteous.
(There was a gap here which is a shame, but my fat fingers hit the delete button)
7:06pm - Drew Barrymore is SERIOUSLY. FUCKING. ANNOYING.
7:08pm - I was a fan of hers until tonight when I learned that she is a shitty actress and couldn't pretend to be humbled in her speech if her life depended on it.
7:10pm - I dare you to try and get through her whole speech. Ricky Rules!! He made fun of Mel's drinking.
7:12pm - One person stole the show. Jason Reitman's mother!!
7:12pm - James Cameron and Mel are neighbors.
7:14pm - Holy fuck. Is Cameron speaking pandoran?!?
7:16pm - Why have I not seen Glee yet?
7:22pm - I love how in Hollywood you can beat and rape a woman and bite a man's ear off and still be celebrated.
7:24pm - Why have I not seen 500 Days Of Summer?
7:35pm - Sandra cried while thanking her husband for being the first person to have her back. Cutest. Thing. Ever.
7:38pm - Pretty sure Drew and Cam are no longer bff's.
7:42pm - I want to have Kate Winslet's babies.
7:51pm - Julia Roberts is druuuuunk
7:52pm - Avatar won. Cameron is once again king of the world!!
7:54pm - God bless the free Moet and FYI James Cameron your hair doesn't make you look younger. That's it for me. Peace out.
8:00pm - It's been great to spend my Sunday night watching rich people congratulate themselves.
