Friday, April 10, 2009

Russell Brand Gives Out Complimentary Robes To His Conquests


Don't ever let it be said that Russell Brand doesn't care about the multiple women he has sex with each night. It turns out that if you are his end of the day women he sends you on your way the next morning with complimentary bathrobes. Sure, he takes their shoes, but they got the enjoyable experience of getting to have sex with as guy who might even take the time to learn your name. For more photos of his latest groupies in their new robes, click here. (Warning the site is NSFW, but Jesus will be happy you came. No, not that Jesus. Sure it is Good Friday, but this is Jesus Martinez.)


Four For Friday

#1 & #2 - This aging C list actor has been as high as A list and as low as a D lister. His A list status came from television and that is where he has tended to stay. He has been in this space before. Anyway, I don't know what kind of open relationship he has with his wife (F list movie actress), but at a party the other night he and his wife attended, our actor met a female fan who wanted some special time with our actor. Although certainly not what one would call attractive, our actor obliged by taking her into a smaller banquet room for 20 minutes. They then came back out and our actor and his wife continued their night.

#3 - This C list movie actress who came into her A list name recognition through a hit television show no longer on the air has always thought very highly of herself. But this is ridiculous, and shows you what an idiot she is. When she sees a homeless person on the street asking for money she stops and gives them her autograph and tells them to sell it on e-bay. I assume she thinks all homeless people have some type of wireless laptop they carry around with them and a way to collect the money.

#4 & #5 - This C list actress and reality star with A list name recognition has been married for a little while to this celebutard. She might be finally catching on to the fact he is only after her money. How so? He wants her to foot the bill for a brand new $500K recording studio at their house.


Random Photos Part One

The nerds of the world will probably be breaking out their Dungeons & Dragons boards tonight. One of the two creators of the game, Dave Arneson has passed away. RIP.
Rashida Jones looks like she is ready to go to Hawaii. Oh, and she looks great.
Amy Poehler and Will Arnett. They do absolutely everything together which I think is great. Could you imagine them ever making a statement like Gwyneth Paltrow about how it's wrong to walk the red carpet with your husband or not necessary. When you see Will & Amy you realize how pretentious and out of touch Gwyneth and Chris are with reality.
I believe the book is called Priceless Memories. Uh huh. I would like to read the the stories of the hidden Price Is Right. That would be a good book. I want to know if anyone ever snorted coke off the Plinko game or had sex in the showcase before the show.
Bruce Dern & David Carradine. They kind of resemble each other.
That is Ben Folds and what I believe are his children. They may in fact be props lent to him for this red carpet appearance.
Ditto with Amy Grant.
You would be correct in assuming that Bai Ling is in the new movie Crank with Jason Statham and Amy Smart. Bai would also like everyone to know that she has not and will not ever have sex with Mickey Rourke.
Benjamin McKenize brings his own handcuffs to the party. He might be propositioning Regis. Anyway, unlike his fellow OC alum, Mischa Barton, he actually has a career. That new show Southland he is in is really good.
Long time no see Clint Black. Apparently they did not provide Clint with prop children.
A first time appearance I think for Chris Pratt.
The randomness of the day goes to Dita von Teese, Sophia Bush, and Amy Smart.
Gavin Rossdale - Los Angeles
Hugh Jackman and Daniel Henney. I have no idea what the pointing index finger means.
The very lovely Iman. This was taken in New York so maybe she is off to kill Heidi Klum and come to the American version of Project Runway. Of course she could just be there promoting her new handbags, one of which she is carrying.
Projected movie title for the life story of Suri Cruise - "The girl who never walks." She will be 3 next week. At what point do they let the girl just walk? They bring her to playgrounds and carry her from thing to thing. Do they have some strange Xenu rule that says you can't touch the ground before a certain age?
Leona Lewis - Los Angeles
The woman on the right facing the camera is Kristen Bell. The blurry woman on the left is Lisa Rinna. You should be grateful it is blurry. No, seriously. OK, I will let you see.
Warned you.
Melora Hardin not only has a new television show coming out on FX, but also a brand new movie she wrote and directed and did the catering for and produced, and cleaned the honey wagon, and so much more.
The very lovely Mindy Kaling.
Orlando Bloom always seems to look exactly the same in every photo.
When you point the fingers like Ryan Cabrera, it really is more of a scissor thing than anything else. Oh, it could be disguising the middle finger.
A rare sighting of Rachel Leigh Cook.
The always hilarious Rainn Wilson.


Caylee Anthony's Grandparents Still Haven't Seen The Light


In a deposition Thursday, both of Caylee Anthony's grandparents were asked about Casey Anthony and whether they thought she had anything to do with the death of Caylee. If you want to read a lot of the quotes from the deposition, you can click here. But the gist of it is that Caylee's grandfather still buys the story that Casey was kidnapped and killed by the nanny.

Meanwhile, grandma says that while Casey sometimes lies, she thinks she is doing it now to protect Caylee and the rest of the family. What does that mean? I will tell you what it means. I still don't believe that grandma and grandpa didn't know what was going on or what went on. They would have to be the densest people on earth. Of course, the fact they still believe the nanny did it kind of makes it seem they really are that dense.


Your Turn

I thought we would do something light and fun this week. First of all it has been awhile since I let you plug what you want to plug, whether it be a website, band, charity, garage sale, or a new way to remove grout from your tub. In addition to that though, I would love to know the answer to this question. If you could reach out and touch any person in the entire world, who would it be?


America Young - Groupidity - Outtakes

Here are some outtakes from the first season of Groupidity.



Kate Hudson & Owen Wilson Over - Again


So much for all of the talk about how Owen Wilson and Kate Hudson were sure to make it this time. In Touch is reporting that Kate and Owen have broken up again. This time for good. Uh huh. Owen, who apparently sees something in Kate that no other human being sees asked Kate to marry him. She said no. They tried to make a go out of it after he asked, but it just wasn't going to work.

I'm not sure why they ever got back together in the first place. I think the first time around kind of showed it was probably not the most healthy of relationship situations for Owen, but he obviously has some kind of feelings for Kate. It is too bad for him that Kate didn't have those same feelings for him. Hopefully he will be ok. We all know what happened last time she broke up with him. I guess we can look for all the heart broken Owen Wilson stories in the next few weeks which will run alongside all of the Kate Hudson and her new man stories and how she has never been happier. Either that or she is focusing on her work and being a great mom.


NY Daily News Blind Item

Which sensual singer tells his girlfriends that although he’s straight, he still receives oral pleasure from other men — then fumes when they suggest he’s bisexual?


Octo-Mom Lies Again - Oh, And She Wants More Money From The Government


Do you remember last week when Nadya Suleman stated explicitly that she wasn't going to do a reality show? Do you remember she said, "I wish the cameras would all just go away?" Well, this week she is an entirely new woman and her lawyer confirmed they have been in discussions with producers about filming a reality show and will pick the producer they want to do business with in the next week or so.

Now, of course you have to understand that she is not doing this for herself. She is doing it for the kids. She does everything for the kids. Spending thousands of dollars at MAC? It's for the kids? $5000 at BeBe over a one week period? It's all for her lovely children. The jacuzzi tub installed in her bathroom? For the kids. The new welfare she is applying for? The kids of course. See, Nadya says that $2000 a month for formula is something she just can't afford so she is going to take advantage of the federal program WIC which basically provides formula, milk, cereal and some other basics to kids so they don't starve. Because Nadya has 14 kids, she would have to earn more than $115K a year to not qualify. Well, I am sure they will rig the payments somehow so she doesn't. Meanwhile she can keep spending that $2000 a month on clothes, or saving up for plastic surgery.


Here Comes The Gravy


Billy Bob Thornton was still in Canada as of last night. I don't actually think you can get kicked out of Canada for being rude, but he is giving it a really good shot. Last night his band played in Toronto. Now, remember the audiences are there to see Willie Nelson and so please don't think people were actually spending their hard earned money to see Billy Bob Thornton.

Anyway, just like Britney did in Vancouver, Billy Bob stopped playing after three songs so he could explain some of his derogatory remarks he made towards Canadians and why he sounded like an a-hole on the radio show.

Here is how that whole thing went with the crowd. (From The Toronto Star)

"It seems as if when I say something it's in the news."

When that drew boos, Thornton continued: "Boo all you want, but I want to say something.... We're really happy to be here, but I need to say something. I talked to this a--hole yesterday.

"I sat down and talked with this guy. He and his producers say, `We promise you we won't say that' (meaning references to Thornton's acting career). The very first thing they said was that.

"I don't really like sensationalism," he added. "If you look someone in the eyes and promise them something, and you don't do it, you don't get the interview. That's the way it goes."

The explanation was met by further boos and catcalls of, "Here comes the gravy."

Damn you have to love Canadians. What that shows is they all watched or listened to the interview when BBT referred to Canadians as mashed potatoes without gravy. That is surely a way to make people fall in love with you.

A reporter from the Toronto Star interviewed BBT before the show last night and said that BBT was covered in thick facial makeup and chain smoking cigarettes. Just that description makes me ill. Billy Bob didn't sound contrite last night. Didn't say he made a mistake. He blamed it all on the DJ from the show, and that he, BBT loves all Canadians. Yeah, well I don't think they love you back.


Thanks California - Now Nick Hogan Can Drive In 49 States


Nick Hogan wanted to move to California from Florida. Apparently someone owed someone a favor and Nick got a job at a record company here. So, Nick didn't want to walk to work or take a bus or anything else that would keep California's citizens safe. Nope. He wanted to drive. Well, California said it wouldn't recognize the license Florida gave him which was restricted to driving to and from work.

Hmmm. What to do? Well Nick's lawyer asked if Nick could just have a regular California driver's license. "Well sure," the state said. So, now because the California license is valid in every state, Nick can drive in any state but Florida. See, Florida decided to not enter any of his past driving information on the national database, so as far as any other state goes, Nick has a clean driving record.

It just seems like a really convenient way to get a license when you shouldn't have one. So, what that means I guess is that every drunk driver who gets his license restricted in Florida can just come out to California and get a brand new license. The trick, and lets face it, it is a trick doesn't work if the license has been suspended, but it does work as long as you have some kind of license even if that license only allows you to drive for an hour a day to go to your parole officer. Come to California and we will give you a full license.

Oh, and according to Nick's attorney, Nick wants to get back into drift racing, but at this point is not competing competitively. Umm. So, he's driving a million miles an hour, just not against anyone? Oh, well sure, he has shown he is responsible enough to do that. Damn I hate this family.


David Caruso Is An Insecure, 70's Porn Loving Kind Of Guy


The worst actor to have a lead role on television, David Caruso, has been sued by his ex-girlfriend. According to her, David has been a bad, bad boy. Actually that makes it sound like he was playfully wrong. He was pretty much a prick to her. From yelling at her for four hours to the point where she actually had to puke, to calling her a birthing cow when she refused to abort their first child.

Nice guy huh? Well, he has never had what one would describe as a sociable personality. Apparently David has quite the stash of 70's porn. I'm sure it is just for research purposes only. The stash of porn isn't just a couple of magazines and a few video tapes. Nope. It is considered to be huge as in just about every commercially released porno from the 70's. It's no wonder David can't act, he doesn't have time for anything but to watch his porn. Oh, he also had time to "raise his hand" to his girlfriend when she was pregnant with their second child.

David is such a sweet guy that he served her a paternity action when she came home from delivering their second child. So, fast forward a little while, and she and Caruso came to a deal whereby he would pay her $1M, but he backed out after a couple weeks. He was probably insecure about his ability to ever get hired again for an acting job if CSI Miami goes off the air.

It will be interesting to see how David responds to the lawsuit. I know he is going to say she cheated on him. He once accused her of wanting to sleep with Billy Dee Williams. I didn't even know Lando Calrissian is still alive. He is, and he is and just turned 72 this week, so happy birthday Billy Dee. I remember when he used to do Colt .45 commercials. The beer, not the gun.

This should be very interesting.


Buffy Is Having A Baby


According to People, Sarah Michelle Gellar and Freddie Prinze Jr are expecting a baby. The funny thing is this news came out yesterday, but neither of their representatives have confirmed it as of yet. That seems odd, but I'm sure it is only a matter of time. It is shocking to me because I really didn't think Sarah let him have sex with her except on very special occasions, like their honeymoon. The good news is that hopefully this will get Sarah to stop smoking and maybe keep her distracted enough so Freddie can escape the house and get some work. Is he even actually still alive? Talk about dropping off the face of the acting planet. Yeah, yeah. He shot a pilot. That doesn't count. He was movie, movie, movie, and then who is Freddie Prinze? I have seen SMG out and about, but I haven't seen Freddie in forever and he hasn't had anything be released in about a year. The last time he showed up in public at an event was sometime last year. According to WireImage, the last time he was photographed at an event with SMG was 2007. I know Gwyneth and Chris do that, but they are off their rocker. Every other couple always does the red carpet together.

So, you are saying, hey they are just a stay at home couple. Yeah, but in the past year she has appeared on at least 16 red carpets all without Freddie. There has always been something strange about this pair. If they are having a baby, then congratulations and hopefully the attention will get Freddie a job or his pilot picked up at least, and SMG will learn some compassion for others.


Ted C Blind Item

Ever since Judas Jack-Off made his smarmy debut, I do think it’s fair to say Toothy Tile’s been breathing a tad easier. Of course, Toothy went so far back into the proverbial closet, I think the only heavy panting T.T. ever does anymore is when he and the GF moon over Pottery Barn chenille throws together. Back to Jack-Off: The dog’s still trying to finagle the old BF into sex again—and I think he’s damn close to succeeding.

After all, Judas is impossibly sexy (some say too much so, but I think of beauty like Kate Bosworth does thinness, never can have too much of that stuff!). He’s hard to resist. Especially when he’s lying to the ditched boyfriend and telling him they can still go off and get married like they'd originally planned, only he just has to “hang out” a little bit longer with the fake girlfriend his management set him up with.

Look, you cretin publicity whore with killer dimples (I mean the ones on your rock-hard ass, not your innocent little face), you’re screwing with the feelings of a man who loves you. This ain’t no Rock Hudson movie. It’s real life. And unless you want some pathetic kind of lying, lonely ending like Hudson himself got, quit effing with people’s lives, starting with your own.

It Ain’t:
Taylor Kistch
Chris Evans
Chris Pine


Thursday, April 09, 2009

Today's Blind Items

This foreign born singer who has been in this space before, doesn't even disguise her dislike of her celebrity husband. When she is drunk, her favorite game is to put her husband on speaker phone and let everyone around her listen while she yells at him, calls him names, and humiliates him as much as possible. No matter what though, he still hasn't left.


Random Photos Part One

Christian Louboutin and David Lynch put together an exhibit called Fetish. How can you not put that on top?
There were so few photos today that I ended up having to put up this photo of Alex McCord and Simon van Kempen. Yeah, it might not be the greatest, but it is better than the Sam Ronson Benji Madden photo I almost posted. I just couldn't see Benji in another sideways baseball cap, slouching, and pretending to be tough.
Yeah, yeah, it's Ashlee Simpson. Oh, I just realized she had a song entitled that. Anyway, the reason I posted the photo is the yellow. Yes, it is a person and it is Ashlee's assistant. Explain to me again why Ashlee needs an assistant. Is she that busy? I'm glad she is doing her part for the economy, but she has an assistant here and someone is home with Brooklyn Junglebook so she presumably has a nanny also. Does it just make her feel really important to have an assistant?
Are those pooka shells around Brad's neck? Maybe his kids made him a necklace of fruit loops.
This is Dara Torres. She has won 12 Olympic medals in swimming. At the 2008 Olympics she won 3 silver medals at the age of 41. She has competed in five Olympic games. She was at a book signing yesterday in Ridgewood, New Jersey.
Also in Ridgewood yesterday was Kathy Ireland signing her latest book.
Apparently being a former super model and SI cover girl gets you the mayor of the city, police, and fire fighters and a key to the city. Kathy has yet to compete in an Olympic Games, but she did star in Loaded Weapon. I think it sucks that the city ignored Dara and that the mayor decided he just wanted to get his chance to meet Kathy because he probably fantasized about her when she guested on Charles In Charge.
Jeff Beck - Philadelphia
Josh Duhamel is not a bad looking guy. Tell me again why he is married to Fergie.
Kim Kardashian thinks she would be perfect for a role in Twilight or as a Bond girl. Umm, she couldn't even give off a decent performance in porn so I don't know why she thinks mainstream acting will be easier. That is Brittny Gastineau sitting next to her.
Molly Shannon surfing in Hawaii.
The baby has escaped from the iPhone.
Nicole Richie doesn't even look pregnant.
When you can see that many bones on a chest, you are way too skinny. Can you imagine seeing it up close and in person. It has to be awful.


Someone Is On Crack - Brittany Murphy Got A Job


I didn't think Brittany Murphy would actually get a real job in acting again. When you get fired off a cartoon you know that you have really ticked people off in the industry. This does pose other problems as well. Brittany managed to snag a role in a popcorn flick and didn't have to resort to acting in indies or anything like that. Now, Dina Lohan's daughter is going to think she can get the same kind of movie and so won't ever get her life together. The unfortunate movie which will have Brittany Murphy's services is The Expendables which stars Sylvester Stallone who also wrote the screenplay and is directing it. Also in the movie are Jet Li, Jason Statham, Dolph Lundgren and Mickey Rourke. Brittany plays the girlfriend of Mickey Rourke and also has to sing.

I think the reason Brittany wanted this role so much is because it is being filmed in South America. She probably thinks she can get what she needs cheaper there and cut out the middleman.


Drunk Driver Kills Angels Pitcher And Two Others


I hate drunk drivers. I especially hate drunk drivers who, after being arrested for drunk driving keep on drinking and driving. Early this morning Nick Adenhart, a 22 year old pitcher for the Anaheim Angels and two other people in the car in which he was in were killed when they were hit by a man who ran a red light. The man who red the red light was driving on a suspended license for a DUI conviction and was drunk when he hit the car carrying four people. He then fled the scene but was caught by the police shortly thereafter.

I don't think there is ever an excuse for drunk driving. I especially don't understand why after being convicted of drunk driving you continue to do it. Presumably if you are arrested for it you realize how lucky you were that nothing happened to anyone while you were driving and are enough of a human to never risk doing it again. Obviously this guy didn't learn that lesson and now three people are dead and one seriously injured is still in the hospital.

All the attention and focus so far has been on the Angels pitcher who had pitched last night and was making his fourth start in the major leagues. But don't forget the other two people who also had their lives tragically cut short. Just because they are not professional athletes doesn't mean they should not be remembered also.


Want To Have Lunch With Paul Rudd Or Jon Hamm?


You know how I feel about auctions and celebrities. I think you are much better off bidding on something signed or something that can come in the mail rather than the meet and greet or having a meal with them. That being said, guys who promise lunch have a much better track record of delivering on their promises than the women who make such a deal. So, if you are willing to take the chance, a plethora of actors have made themselves available for lunch in an auction to benefit the Adrienne Shelly Foundation. Besides Jon Hamm or Paul Rudd you can dine with Hamm's "Mad Men" co-star John Slattery, Kevin Smith, Keri Russell, Nathan Fillion, Patrick Duffy, David Schwimmer, Julianna Margulies and others. The auctions are scheduled to end April 16.

If you want to bid, you can click here. If you want to learn more about the Adrienne Shelly Foundation, you can click here.