Tom Cruise Talks Nonsense At Scientology Meeting
This past weekend, Scientologists gathered in the UK for what I thought was some big fund raising concert. Chick Corea was the main attraction. Apparently musical acts like Snoop and Lady GaGa don't seem to want to join Scientology so you get Chick Corea.
Apparently though when the Scientologists get together they have to have speeches. Speeches that make no sense to anyone except themselves and Tom Cruise gave the keynote nonsensical speech of the weekend.
According to US Weekly, Tom said, "Because we never took our eyes off the ultimate prize, we stand where we are today. We are in this together!"
Umm, what is the ultimate prize? A fake marriage? A movie career in the toilet? And how exactly are the other people standing in it together with you? Unless they suddenly win the lottery and can contribute a lot more money, I don't think anyone is actually standing together with you.
According to the witness who saw this and now faces a life of watching Far And Away and Battlefield Earth as a punishment, "Tom was swaying and looked like he was in heaven. He was really, really into it. Katie was next to him doing her best to look as enthusiastic. She was clapping along with the song, but was totally out of sync. Suri was standing by, looking a little bemused in a cute little party dress."
Suri was probably upset they didn't have Xenu coloring books to keep her entertained so the church probably special ordered her some along with some more custom toddler Louboutins.
John Travolta and Kelly Preston were at the even but neither spoke and simply just stood there holding hands.
Tom saved his best for last. At a reception following the speeches, Tom said, "They're squirrels. Stuck in an electronic incident. It makes me so angry!" You make sense of that one. Can you imagine listening to him all day and all night.
