The Secret To Picking Up Women Is To Have 8 Kids
Apparently even though I live in my basement and with my parents and am overweight to the point I can't see if my shoes match I could still get 23 year old women to have sex with me and I don't even need to pay. All I need to do is find someone to have 8 kids with and get a reality show and I am set. Sure, I would have to increase my Ed Hardy wardrobe and start chain smoking, but it looks like you can be overweight and have hair plugs and still pull in the 20 year olds. The secret is to have the 8 kids. I can see the book now. How To Pick Up Women. Here is a sample paragraph. "Blah, blah, blah, have 8 kids."
Radar Online is reporting that Jon Gosselin found another 23 year old to have sex with him. This one he has hired to babysit his kids before but on Saturday night it went from business to personal as Stephanie Santoro spent the night with Jon in his apartment over the garage. It isn't exactly the cupboard beneath the stairs, but I'm sure it was magic for her. I mean who wouldn't want to have sex with Jon. He dresses like a million bucks, is in the middle of a divorce, chain smokes, has bad hair plugs and has a burgeoning K-Fed belly. Oh, and then he has the 8 kids.
The couple met at a bar Saturday night and after Jon whipped out the pictures of his 8 kids she was ready to head back to his place. They got there at 315am and by 715am she was ready to leave. I'm guessing the sun came through the windows and she freaked out. Either that or Jon had one of his other women coming over to the house to spend some time with The Love Buddha as he likes to call himself.
Stephanie, an aspiring model says on her resume that she is willing to pose nude. I bet she is but you better have 8 kids and be hot like Jon Gosselin.
Here's her Model Mayhem profile...
ReplyDeleteStephanie Santoro.
Enty, if it makes you feel any better, she's not much more of a catch looks-wise than Jon is. Fug attracts fug.
Good lord - you MUST be a famewhore if you're willing to sleep with this jackass. Divorced with 8 kids = dealbreaker!
ReplyDeleteLOL at "it isn't exactly a cupboard beneath the stairs, but I'm sure it was magic for her."
ReplyDeleteIS this family the quintessential example of a train wreck or what? Can't wait for the twins biography when it comes out in 10 years...
ReplyDeleteThose pictures look like slutty senior portraits. I can't imagine how unphotogenic this chick is if those were the best of the photo session. Who told her she could model? She looks inbred.
ReplyDeleteWho the hell told this girl she could be a model?
ReplyDeleteI hope these poor kids don't turn out as messed up as I have a feeling they will! But if they do, then can have their own reality show about it as adults. I can see it now: "Celebrity Rehab - The Gosselin 8 Edition"
ReplyDeleteUh, she needs to stop aspiring. It ain't gonna happen.
ReplyDeleteshe's like the low rent version of ali lohan. This dude really attracts the ick nasts of the population.
ReplyDeleteJon is getting more ass than a toilet seat.
ReplyDeleteNot a huge proponent of plastic surgery here, but this chick could use a nose job!
ReplyDeleteTo me, the 8 kids would be a deal breaker. But then my biological clock isn't ticking.
Enty, we'd still love you if you lived in the tool shed behind your parents' house and weighed 750 pounds.
What is the child support for 8 kids per month?
ReplyDeleteSeriously, if he had his kids' best interests at heart, he would not be doing this kind of stuff. This is the behavior of someone with either a self-destructive streak or a drug/drink problem. I knew there were guys out there who would date anything, but these chicks take the cake for aspiring to low standards.
ReplyDeleteMany months ago, before all of this stuff came out, all I knew of these people were the clips of them shown on "The Soup." Kate looked like a shrew, and I felt bad for Jon as he looked miserable. Those were the days.
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately I know a lot more now (though I'm happy to say I've never seen a show), but Jon is pathetic. I can't believe what a complete loser he is. I still don't care for Kate, but seeing what she had to put up..ugh. Those poor, poor children.
Can we ban these people, please?
teehee @ "Sure, I would have to increase my Ed Hardy wardrobe..." and "The Love Buddha"!
ReplyDeleteseriously enty, words fail me. *hearts*
she is like the low rent verson of Spitz' hookerfriend. and SHE was low rent herself,so shit, she is like the Income Assistance version of Spitzer's ho.
ReplyDeleteWow Jon is a class act. Dad of the Year material for sure. What is most telling is that he obviously thinks by doing these stupid interviews that he'll make himself look "victimized" when in reality a grown man with any self-respect would NEVER want to be seen that way. So, all he's doing is reinforcing the perception that he is total trash and a big ass baby.
ReplyDeleteIf I were Kate G this would be the easiest breakup I ever had. No use mourning the loss of this clown. Next!
Wait, he is living over the garage? So, when he drags these hos home, the kids get to see them come and go? "Mommy, who is that woman going up the stairs to see Daddy?" times 8. I almost feel sorry for Kate now.
ReplyDeleteWell it's obvious to me that he's going for quantity NOT quality...YUCK!
ReplyDeleteAren't they in the process of getting a divorce, but it isn't finalized yet. So, if that's the case, then they are still legally married, although separated. At least he could wait until the divorce was official before really giving being a complete ass 110% of his energy...
ReplyDeleteNeeds a nose job.
ReplyDeleteWhen I first saw the pictures I thought I'd be nice and not mention the nose. I guess I didn't have to worry about that.
ReplyDeleteMaybe there were reasons behind Kate's bitchiness?
I can't wait until this bunch is in the "whatever happened to" category.
"I'm guessing the sun came through the windows and she freaked out."
ReplyDeleteWho wouldn't freak out with a face like her's LOL.
I thought I read that Jon got a place at Trump's building or some expensive building???
I'm floored by how many women are into this stunned looking loser. I've always sort of been on Kate's side of the rope, but there's seriously no stepping over to his side now.
ReplyDeleteI kind of get the impression that either Jon is on some sort of medication, or is drinking heavily. Even if his penis is alive and well, his eyes look...dead.
Jax - I think you explained it perfectly.
ReplyDeleteI don't get it -- is his dick made out of Godiva?
ReplyDeleteWe have an expression over here - BOBFOC (Urban Dictionary link - http://tinyurl.com/yo8wpg) and she's very much it.
ReplyDeleteThe more exposure he gets, the more I dislike him & favour Kate. She's hardly pure as snow but god damn, this manchild is pathetic.
I keep picturing Austin Powers trying to rip off "her" hair and saying "That's a MAN baby!"
ReplyDeleteSunnyside; Jon lives over the garage when it's his turn with the kids. The other spouse is "off" and not even in town at that time. They have nannies and other help. They're not flying solo at all with the kids, that's taken out in editing.
I hope Kate kicks him out of the Gosselin Compound for this one
ReplyDelete"Mommy, Is Daddy paying for babysitter to watch over HIM now?
ReplyDeleteCause she just left his 'partment over the garage."
Do you think Jon gives his conquests Ed Hardy robes for the morning after? Sort of like Russell Brand Robes but with the Ed Hardy classy :p.
This appears to be the second woman he has taken to the house where the kids live. Most women would never bring a new man to the house or allow them to meet their kids until they are sure it is a long-term relationship and the man is trustworthy. I can't believe that Kate "allows" him to bring these women near the kids.
ReplyDelete"This one he has hired" Mystery solved. Skip the kids and hire yourself one, too.
ReplyDeleteAspiring Model?? .. Ya in her dreams perhaps! With that mug .. I think not! I mean .. if she is an aspiring model .. then I am an aspiring Swim Suit Model!! Trust me .. NO ONE wants to see that!
ReplyDeleteOkay, I'm going to try to be positive: It looks like she has a nice body.
ReplyDeleteToo bad about the butterface, tho'.
Ye Gods, I'm no Cindy Crawford/Brooke Shields and even I think I'd make a better model than this... thing. Pure desperation, esp considering who she's schtupping. As for him -- geez, no wonder Kate appeared to be such a harridan! Forget about her having 8 kids -- girl had 9 kids to deal with all by her lonesome, including this overgrown one. And I swear to God this is the only and last time I will ever comment on anything related to that whole circus.
ReplyDelete