Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Oldest Woman To Give Birth Dies
The world record has changed a couple of times in the two years since Spaniard Maria Bousada became the oldest woman in the world to give birth. She died this week at 69. At the age of 66 when she gave birth to twins she was by far the oldest woman to have given birth. She became pregnant through in vitro right here in California. She told the Pacific Fertility Center that she was just 55 and they never bothered to ask her for identification. Apparently 55 is their cutoff for single women. No one asked for identification? At all? That seems ridiculous. There is no paperwork or anything involved in these types of transactions? They just take the money I guess. She sold her house and paid $59,000 for the procedure.
Shortly after the birth of her twins she discovered a tumor. It is believed she died as a result of that tumor. Her brother revealed that in the past couple of weeks he sold the exclusive details of her death to a television station so that way there would be enough money to raise the children. I guess he must have sold it for a lot of money. The kids are just two years old and have a bunch of living to do.
I know I have discussed the whole pregnant at 70 thing here before and when she got pregnant she thought she would live as long as other members of her family. Her mom had died at the age of 101 and Maria thought she might even have a chance to become a grandmother before she died. Discovering a tumor could happen to a woman of any age. I don't like that she lied about her age, but I also don't like the fact that the place she had the procedure performed seems to care more about money than their written policy. If you have an age limit written than you must have that written for some reason and so it would seem wise to check.
No one knows who exactly is going to raise the two kids but probably it will be her brother. In an interview with News Of The World that she gave when her pregnancy became public, Maria said she was hoping to find a younger man to marry so he could help her look after the kids.
That is EXACTLY why you're not supposed to give birth after your child bearing years are up.
ReplyDeleteSure, you can argue that lots of young women die as a result of childbirth, but this was an even riskier birth, and she should have known better.
Money can buy you lots of things -- it can buy you people who fawn over you and tell you how wonderful you are, it can buy you children, it can buy you material goods -- BUT MONEY CAN'T BUY COMMON SENSE!
My thoughts are with those kids.
omg, those poor little twins. what now? :(
ReplyDeleteTHIS MAKES ME CRAZY, MY MOM WAS OLDER...VERY HEALTHY HER WHOLE LIFE ..DIDN'T NEED HELD TO GET PREGNANT,
ReplyDeleteAND I STILL LOST HER EARLY BEFORE I WAS 30.
IT'S JUST NOT FAIR...
FOR THIS WOMAN IT WAS A TOTALLY SELFISH ACT...
I KNOW I CAN'T BE OBJECTIVE ON THIS..BUT STILL...WRONG..SO VERY WRONG.
In all the intake assessments I did, I've never asked someone for their ID. You generally just take someone's word for it.
ReplyDeleteOh wow. I know that it's risky and hazardous to have kids after a certain age, but who am I to tell anyone that they shouldn't be allowed to share in the joys of motherhood because of their age? Too bad she didn't carry out her plan to find a younger partner to take care of the kids before she decided to have them.
ReplyDeleteIt's a lot harder to find a good man when you have small children. And I'm sure being in your late 60's with small babies makes it much harder to play the cougar card...
Best wishes to the twins.
I'm with you AnonMom! And how old is this brother who may be raising the twins? Maybe the twins have a niece or nephew who can care for them!
ReplyDeleteAbout the ID issue - I recently went to a dermatologist for the first time, and I was asked for a photo ID. Trust me, I wasn't there to have a baby.
Maybe this is the same clinic that helped OctoMom.
ReplyDeleteIf not, clearly, there are few ethical thoughts in the the world of in-vitro.
I wonder who the egg mother was? Was it a secret donor? Those poor kids do have a mother somewhere.
ReplyDeleteYou know what? If you ask those kids when they are older would they rather be alive without their mother or never to have been born, I'm guessing they'll choose the former. I'm sorry she didn't live to see her children grow up but I am happy she had the opportunity to have them.
ReplyDeleteShe could have got a tumour at 40. Life sucks...
ReplyDeleteI know how the psosts for this sort of topic go, as we've touched on a similar story in the past... and I know it's a controversial topic...
ReplyDeletebut honestly, selfish? She didn't plan on dying that soon. Selfish would be having children despite the fact you have a terminal, communicable illness like AIDS that the babies will most likely be inflicted with and have to suffer with their entire lives. Anyone can get a tumor and die. She wanted children, like so many women who are older, or have a genetic abnormality and are at high risk. I think what's selfish is saying that having children is something only healthy young women are allowed to do.
It just bugs me because there are a lot of stupid, selfish young women having babies. They leave them with the grandparents every weekend so they can party and get laid and they excuse it by saying "I really need a break". The rich ones get nannies to raise their children... so older women can raise our kids for us, but can't have kids of their own??
And never are young healthy women questioned when having child after child that they have no intention of raising properly.
The older parents are usually the ones who put everything into raising their children, because they've already established themselves and sown their wild oats.
It's sad that these kids lost their mother, and i know how many people will argue about the rates of death when someone reaches a certain age.... I just think that calling her selfish because she wanted children is wrong.
This is just very sad.
ReplyDeletejungle, i know what you mean about how these topics can go south, but in a way, she DID have a terminal illness. at age 70, it's called "life". :)
ReplyDeletei'm more upset about the extreme view of" would they rather have a mother or be alive?" when this shouldn't have to have been an option in the first place, and that's entirely the problem. just as young women out reproducing with no thought to the future, this woman also did not provide adequately for her children's future.
so sad for the children. very, very sad.
It's not her age that is the issue, it's the fact that she didn't have much of a backup plan other than securing the book deal.
ReplyDeleteAny mother can die at any age... so before you go judging her, what's YOUR backup plan. AnonMom, that means you.
Infertility can happen to anyone. While I don't condone having children at this woman's age, it's important not to start using this as an example of conception via donor egg because I know with absolute certainty that this woman is an EXCEPTION and not the norm in the world of ART (Assisted Reproductive Technology.)
What is very disturbing is that PFC allowed this to happen without verification. They are one of the best IVF clinics in Northern California. This could get them shut down or investigated, at the least.
And BTW, the cutoff age most clinics used for donor egg is 50. Some cut off earlier. So please, do not go ranting and raving about this woman as if she were a 'typical' egg donor recipient. I can assure you she is not. These women (OctoMom, Jon&Kate) give infertility treatments a bad name and it is horrifying to the woman who are dealing with the disease. Most IVF/donor egg patients are in their 30s/40s, many are younger.
Just remember, before you judge... it could happen to you or someone you know. So make sure you're bringing attention to the right issue.
@MisterBunn: egg donors are not 'secret donors.' Some donate anonymously, some donors are known to the recipient couple. The couple and the egg donor have a contract, everything is done legally. Often times a fee is involved, some donors refuse to charge out of the good of their (blessed) hearts.
ReplyDeletePlease don't talk about egg donation as if it's some back closet, dirty thing. I can assure you it is not.
Thank you.
@MisterBunn: also, egg donors are NEVER referred to as the mother of children conceived via egg donation. They are the genetic donor, nothing more. The same as if you were to donate a lung or other organ. They are donating an egg (actually, quite a few eggs are taken in the procedure, to ensure success.) Most donor/recipient contracts have specific clauses that define the relationship between the donor and the recipient. There is only one mother, and that is the birth mother. She is referred to as the biological mother.
ReplyDeleteMy guess would be that in order to sustain the pregnancy, there had to be a goodly amount of hormones administered, because a 60-something woman does not produce the hormones needed to sustain a pregnancy.
ReplyDeleteAnd all of that could really mess with your system and produce reactions that might not have otherwise occurred. Foolin' with mother nature is possible, but not always wise.
I do hope she made arrangements for good people to raise her children.
Coloratura - yes, I will judge her for acting irresponibly and having absolutely zero backup plan other than marrying a younger man. That's just foolish and dumb.
ReplyDeleteMy back up plan? I have several, thank you very much. Although I'm a single mom, I have:
a) a will that designates who will take care of my child in the event I pass away.
b) a generous life insurance policy that goes directly to my son and will take care of all of his needs.
c)I am not in my freaking sixties and am working for a living and can provide a good lifestyle for my son.
I am not of *retirement age* and no, I don't need a younger or older man to take care of me and my child, THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
My son was not planned, but I did take into account everything before he was born.
Thanks for your IGNORANCE-BASED judgement. Ta ta.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteI think Katherine Jackson should raise them---maybe Michael is the father.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeletePeople die. Sometimes pretty damn randomly. My Dad died of a heart attack at 42. This woman had no reason to expect to die given her family history. It sucks. I feel sorry for the children, but most of all I feel sorry for her--how horrible she must have felt at the thought of not being able to raise them.
ReplyDeleteYou dont' have kids after 50 because you'll forget where you put them.
ReplyDeleteBiologically, women are not supposed to be having children in their 60s. It's called menopause.
Ever heard of the generation gap? This was way too large of a gap for someone her age.
Many grandparents this woman's age are raising their grandchildren, so you could argue that she is not too old to do the same; the difference is that she was "mom" and not "grandma" and has no backup plan. Kids can put the generation gap into perspective better if they know they're dealing with grandparents; they know there will be a big difference between the two generations.
Well first .. this lax fertility clinic deal does not remotely surprise me given the whole Octo-Mom situation. Second, sadly, nothing hypes up the growth of cancer cells like pregnancy hormones. Very sad for everyone involved.
ReplyDeleteyes, people die. but having a kid at 66 is insane.
ReplyDeletei'm so sick of this selfish shit people are doing, i could scream. i'm not much kinder towards young, single women who have planned pregnancies either, but this is just ridiculous. poor, poor babies.
well i'd like to say RIP to the passed on mom since no one else has.
ReplyDeletehow about looking at the fact that had she NOT had the kids, the tumour would have gone undetected and been even more traumatic for the family to have to cope with an unexpected death. i dont know the time line of her illness but...seems to be a blessing in disguise that she had the babies.
young,healthy new moms can die of cancer too.
"i'm not much kinder towards young, single women who have planned pregnancies either, but this is just ridiculous."
ReplyDeleteoooh..intriguing, explain!
;o)
(and i'm ducking for cover, Nancer you're on your own)
@ MisterBunn- I was watching a show a few years back... I don't remember what show it was but it touched on how so many young women will sell their eggs to make the money to afford breast implants/ cosmetic surgery. It would be ridiculous to consider an egg donor as a willing parent. I'm not saying all egg donors are as selfish, but simply being the donor does not a mother make.
ReplyDeleteI like the point Jax made... the discovery of the tumor, albeit too late to save her, at least allowed her family to say their goodbyes.
Lots of interesting comments here.
ReplyDeleteI will say that I've NEVER heard anyone say that MEN shouldn't have children beyond a "certain" age, but people say WOMEN shouldn't have them after a certain age.
Oh really? Because grandmothers have never raised children so women "can't" after a certain age? Give me a break.
If you actually look at children (there have been studies on this) and not just spout out theories, you'll see that most children raised by older mothers (and even older grandmothers) turn out just fine.
Nothing can change the fact that this is an unfortunate tragedy.
ReplyDeleteIf this woman went to that much trouble to get pregnant at least we know how much she wanted to be a mother and how loved those kids must have been. Even if it was for the first few years of their lives. There are so many people who aren't devoted parents and who find their children cute, but annoying and they'd rather pass them off to someone else than spend time with them. These children were lucky they had a mother that cared so much for them. It's a shame it wasn't for longer.
I don't think it is fair that someone can get pregnant accidentally and be selfish enough to try to raise the child themselves, while not putting the child first. I know plenty of people who don't want to put their baby up for adoption, but don't want to stop drinking and partying and staying out all hours of the night. Their ages range from 16-35. While I'm sure she was much more mature than these people, it's unfortunate she wasn't able to enjoy motherhood 20 years earlier.
Thoughts and prayers with the family.
Las Vegas would have given her very poor odds of survival as a mother at her age.
ReplyDeleteShe gambled and lost.
The babies lost far far more.
I agree with those who said that older people who actually WANT children are far better than the idiots my age ( mid 20's ) and younger that get knocked up and oops have a child when they still have no real set ingrained values and life lessons cemented inside of themselves. HOWEVER, I know i am going to get a pile of shit for this but I just believe so much in adoption that to me IVF shouldnt have neccassiarly have been the first choice this woman made. I know i dont know her (rip) but there are TOO MANY FUCKING PEOPLe in this world as it is and nature is well, naturally trying to stem some of the endless tide of babies babies babies. Ivf helps people this is true and more power to them but all i can say is we are all one species, we are all related in that way so adoption is so important because its helping your fellow species thrive, not adding to the population out of some selfish need to procreate when maybe nature says you shouldnt.
ReplyDeleteThis story goes the column of:
ReplyDeleteEffed up world
DN, I'm sure your intakes weren't as serious as possibly impregnanting somebody. Its okay to shave a few years off at the ER, but when it comes to IVF, truth should be the best, and only story!
ReplyDeleteGosh, I thought my mom was old when I was born at almost 42 years old! That was back in 1981, so my mom and dad weren't able to do anything but conceive the natural way!
a lot of you people have made me very sick. yeah, this was a stupid move made by the mother, but seriously, doesn't almost every woman have a dream to be a mother? so she didn't have them at an appropriate age, but she survived the pregnancy and the first 3 years of their lives, which are the most important years of a child's life. having these twins was most likely the biggest joy of her life.
ReplyDelete2 months after my father was killed in a construction accident, my mother found out she was pregnant...with me, leaving me with no father. 34 minutes after i was born, my mother bled to death. she didn't even get to hold me. this left me with no mom and no dad. my mother was an only child and had lost her mother and father in a car accident when she was 9. she was raised from 9 to 19 by her grandmother. her only living relative left. so where do you think i ended up? well, my great grandmother. yes, the same woman who raised my mother. at the age of 65, my great grandmother was raising a premature new born. me. she was an awesome person and did a great job raising me for the few years i had with her. she passed when i was 4, i then ended up in a foster home where i stayed until i was 18. here i am now, 23. i have my own house, a vehicle, a successful career, I'm financially stable, and i have a little family of my own now made up of me, my fiancee, our two dogs and our cat. i love my life and i wouldn't change anything about it. not one thing. i know my parents and great grandma are looking out for me. they are up there watching down, guiding me. yes, i miss my mother and father, both whom i never got to meet. they are still my parents and i love them very much.
these twins are 3. they have a whole future ahead of them, the only thing they are missing is their mother. I'm sure they are being taken care of. they will turn out just fine. just because you lose your mother, no matter what age she was, its not the end of the world.
if the pregnancy of this woman wasn't meant to happen, it wouldn't have. but it was obviously meant to happen.
RIP Spaniard. <3
Good luck twins, have a long, happy and joyful life! <3