The Most Ridiculous Story Of The Week - Jessica Simpson's Revenge Diet
There is nothing a tabloid that loves more than a breakup followed by the woman in the relationship getting photographed exercising. Instant diet cover. The latest example of this is OK! Magazine which talks about Jessica's revenge diet and how she has already lost ten pounds in ten days. But wait, there's more. If you buy the issue or at least can take notes at the checkout stand fast enough you can find out the exercise plan she used and her simple and easy diet.
Considering that OK! didn't actually interview Jessica for the story I find it fascinating they were able to obtain her diet and know that she has in fact lost ten pounds in ten days. Then of course, I could picture Pimpa Joe yelling at Jessica to get on the scale while he has a writer from the magazine on the phone.
Pimpa - "Jessica get on the scale. You have to lose ten pounds for me to get my money."
Jessica - "I have lost 9 pounds."
Pimpa - "Well take off your clothes and get naked. Here, let me help. I want that money. I can go buy a speedboat just like the one you bought Tony and then we can go fishing together and he can be my best friend and he will let me manage him."
I love the line on the cover which says, "Her sexy body is back." The translation is that ten pounds ago she was a fat hag who lost her boyfriend. What kind of message is that sending to anyone? It gets worse inside. In the interview with the "source," there is a quote about why Jessica is losing the weight. “She doesn’t want to give anyone more reason to not take her seriously." Umm, so the source is saying that people who weigh ten pounds more than Jessica are not taken seriously or that we as the general public don't take her seriously because she weighed ten pounds more? We don't take her seriously because she blew off her tour this last summer and didn't try and improve. She made horrible movies but thought she was great in them, and she wanted to throw herself a Barbie birthday party for her 29th birthday. I don't think any of those things had anything to do with her weight and it really ticks me off that weight is supposed to be the determining factor in everything you do.
Pimpa Joe - (to the writer) "Hang on a second will you. I need to put the phone down. I can't get her bra off with one hand."
