Amy Winehouse Sounds Pretty Damn Normal - Throws J-Lo Under A Bus For Good Measure
Amy Winehouse was in court this morning. For once it had nothing to do with drugs or divorce or whether her beehive wig should be condemned as radioactive waste.
Amy was there because she has been charged with assaulting a fan backstage at a concert. Last September Sherene Flash went backstage at a concert that Amy's goddaughter Dion held. Sherene wanted a picture with Amy. Sherene says Amy punched her in the face. Amy said she was intimidated and that Sherene was drunk. Amy also said it was more of a forearm to the chest to get some space.
The thing is I actually believe Amy.
Amy admitted that she had been drinking that night. Her choice of beverages included champagne, vodka and white wine.
"I didn't know what she was going to do. She lunged at me and put her arm around me. She was just drunk. She's a nice girl, she was just drunk. I think it was just intimidating. Suddenly, out of nowhere, she's got her arm around me, her face next to mine, and there's a camera in front of me. I think she was being overly friendly, but that was intimidating, I was scared. She's a big girl. She was just being overly presumptuous. I'm not Mickey Mouse, I'm a human being."
Amy then told the woman that she would take a picture but she needed two minutes first to say goodbye to someone. The someone was the stylist of Dion. At that point, Sherene moved in closer and the incident happened. Sherene said Amy punched her in the face and left her eye slightly swollen. Amy stood up in front of the judge to show how tiny she is and that she could have never reached the woman's face with her hand.
When Amy was asked if she was a demanding celebrity, she showed that she reads or at least listens to gossip.
"I'm not like that. I'm not a Jennifer Lopez, paint the room white before I get there and I want five bunches of lilies."
No, just champagne, vodka and white wine. Reporters in the courtroom said Amy looked sober and in good shape. Did she overreact? Maybe. I don't know who to believe. I do think that there are better things for a government to spend money on than this trial. I'm not condoning violence, but even Sherene admitted she was barely hurt if at all and she admitted she was drunk also and maybe acting aggressively.
Lawyers and Judges LOVE to spend tax payer money on the most ridiculous charges. It's a fact, jack.
ReplyDeleteWow Amy and Whitney BOTH appearing SOBER?!?!
ReplyDeleteThis is definitely a sign of the apocolypse
If Sherene admitted that she was barely hurt then why didn't she just drop the charges?
ReplyDeleteOh I forgot, she probably wanted a little cash to go along with her minor bruises.
someone must have stayed at her place and chaperoned 24 hours prior to the trial.
ReplyDeleteI love the fact that she didn't settle this out of court. (if that was possible?)
ReplyDeletesober amy is awesome! maybe...hopefully she sees the bigger picture for once.
ReplyDeleteShe cleans up remarkably well. If she could just take that photo and tape it to her medicine cabinet with a little label that says "THIS IS ME", she might be able to focus on staying this way.
ReplyDeleteI really hope she keeps it together, I soooo want another album from her!
ReplyDeleteShe sounds surprisingly coherent (meant in the best possible way!), good job Amy, she looks much better than pre-st.lucia amy
ReplyDeleteSober Amy would be the sassiest superhero ever.
ReplyDeleteShe looks so good there. Man, I hope she can stay sober. I love her music, and she has the talent; I just wish that she can keep it together and use it.
ReplyDeleteI agree, Damned Fallacey. I really want new Amy music, pronto.
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ReplyDeleteI'm with Jamila. That does NOT sound like the rambling incoherence that we're used to with Amy.
ReplyDeleteGood for her if she can keep it together.
I just so grateful she managed to find a pair of ballet slippers that go with the power suit. *wheew!* Fashion emergency avoided!
ReplyDeleteI am really jonesin for some new Amy tunes. I hope she can keep it together.
ReplyDelete:)
teehee, looks like aw has taken a peek at j-ho's rider...she got it right.
ReplyDeletei'm kinda liking sober amy too...
Oh well gee I guess I'm not seeing the same photo of Amy you all are, she looks pretty whack still
ReplyDeleteShe looks so much better. I hope this is a sign of better things to come.
ReplyDeleteWhattheheck is on her feet? Those aren't even ballet shoes, they're just bedroom slippers.
ReplyDeletep.s. I would LOVE it if Amy could write a good "throw Blaaaake under the bus" song.
ReplyDeleteI know that Amy does some very wild things at times. (A LOT) But, if some random person was drunk and hanging all over me (or in my face), I'd push/shove/forearm them, too.
ReplyDeletebrendalove - I'm not sure the english language has enough colorful adjectives to describe BLAAAAAAAAAAAAKEEEEE with any real accuracy. Plus, it may prove difficult to rhyme AssFace Bottom Feeder with anything. Hope she tries anyway.
ReplyDeleteHere's a starter verse for her:
ReplyDeleteBlaaaake you're an AssFace Bottom Feeder,
You were great fun to party with,
But glad I didn't breed with ya!
She dropped a douchebag and got sober! What a trade-off. If you are reading this Amy:
ReplyDeleteKeep up the good work and please head back to the studio.
OMG! that jlo comment was hilarious!
ReplyDelete@ figgy-
ReplyDeletei've thought that all along! her "shoes" look just like my favorite (but harder to find) leather bottomed isotoner slippers!
maybe i'll wear mine to the next premiere, see if anybody notices!