Forigve Me For I Am About To Sin

I have been so good and have not mentioned Lindsay Lohan by name in quite some time and this is an exception to the ban, and not a lifting of the ban. I have enjoyed not talking about her fights or posting her photos and I think the world is a better place for it. I'm proud of myself for ignoring the whole warrant situation and the broken window during the fight, but I have to vent now.

Lindsay is on the cover of Nylon this month for their tenth anniversary issue. She is Teri Garr and that magazine is Letterman for all the times that Lindsay has been on the cover and in its pages.

Anyway, in the interview she blames the tabloids for ruining her career. Ummm. Is she serious? Lindsay Lohan is responsible for ruining Lindsay's career. Sure, you can throw some Michael and some Dina and some effed up parenting into that if you want. I will give you that, but there is no way the tabloids did it. Did the tabloids make her go to rehab three times with another on the way soon? Did the tabloids make her late for work or miss work or days shooting? Did the tabloids make her drink or do drugs or chase down her assistant in a stolen SUV? Did the tabloids make her be a diva on the Ugly Betty set? Did the tabloids give her the shortest temper known to man?

Oh, and it gets worse. In the interview she says she would love to be in Alice In Wonderland and makes it seem like she was thisclose to getting the part that Anne Hathaway is playing. She is so full of crap. There is no way she would get near that production unless she was hanging around with Sam at the after party when Sam was working. This is the problem with Lindsay Lohan. Despite the fact that she is the biggest mess around, she does get lots of offers for employment. She really does, and they are not for porn. They are for indies where she would make $100K for a month's work but she won't take them. Why? Because in her head she is a huge star and a great actress. She isn't. I know all of you loved her in Mean Girls, but that is because it was Tina Fey who wrote the damn thing and Lindsay didn't have to stretch at all. Parent Trap? Freaky Friday? She was a kid playing a kid. She did fine, and if she would actually work in some of these indie films she might actually be good. She doesn't want that. She wants A list movies with A list stars.

"I'm talking to a lot of people right now," she says. "One is Sean Penn – I spoke to him again the other day. We're trying to get Seth Rogen for this project, but Seth won't call us back. So call us back, Seth, if you're reading this!"

I think what she is trying to say is that Seth won't call Lindsay back. As much as I would love to think Seth would blow off the a-hole known as Sean Penn, I don't think he would do that. Why would Seth be in anything with Lindsay Lohan? So he can get laid? There is no reason to choose a f**ked up has been actress when there are lots of others from which to choose.

Grow up Lindsay. Take responsibility for yourself. Go work for a living for awhile. If you don't like the tabloids, then move. Leave California. They won't follow you for long, and you won't have any excuses.