Please Stop Having Sex In The Grocery Store

I know you are expecting to read some post about people who are always having sex in the grocery store. Do people do that? Do you ever wonder whether, after the store closes, maybe some workers are doing some things they probably shouldn't while laying on the display of apples?

Apparently Bruce Springsteen has not been grocery shopping in quite some time. From the quotes in an recent interview with The Observer, I'm saying it has been, many, many years.

"They opened up this big, beautiful supermarket near where we lived. I remember walking through the aisles and I thought 'This place is spectacular. This place is a fantasy land!'"

Umm, Bruce. It's a place to get food and booze and where people wonder if they have enough money to buy enough to feed their family. It probably seems like a fantasy land only to people who don't go grocery shopping or to people who don't have grocery stores in their countries.

"And then I started to get into it. I started looking around and hmm - the subtext in here is so heavy. It's like, do people really want to shop in this store or do they just want to screw on the floor?"

Has anyone ever said to themselves, "You know what? Screw the shopping, I am just going to find someone and throw them up against the Captain Crunch and have my way with them." As you may have guess, I am fairly perverted, but I can honestly say that I have never thought about laying down on the floors of any grocery store. Never even crossed my mind. Do I want to roll around in the bakery displays? Well sure, but who doesn't want the chance to do that? But sex on the floor? I don't think so.

"Maybe it's about buying groceries but maybe there's this other thing going on. In the States supermarkets are sort of shameless, the bounty in them is overflowing. So the sexual subtext, well, maybe it's just twisted me, but wow, it's my new favorite place."

I'm glad he enjoys going, so maybe now it will give him some perspective. Bruce has always been the guy for the middle class and the guy who cares for the downtrodden. He is still a big giver and donates a huge amount of his time, but either he was smoking a LOT right before and during the interview or he has really lost touch. I honestly think you would only get this feeling about a grocery store if you were stoned out of your mind or if you had not been in a really long time. I just don't think any of his fans have those kinds of thoughts about the grocery store. I don't think the average person thinks of it as a fantasy land. I could go into a big spiel about how a grocery store will give you a cross section of life like almost no other place, but I don't think any of them are thinking about sex.