Friday, December 05, 2008
No Means No
I guess Boy George has learned the hard way that no means so. George was found guilty of one count of false imprisonment for handcuffing the escort he had hired to George's bed. Apparently this was because they guy had not want to have sex with George right when he laid eyes on him. The escort then got beat with a chain while handcuffed. I'm guessing George thought all of that was included in the price of admission so to speak. A jury thought otherwise.
Have you seen George lately? He is not exactly the picture of perfection. I think that anyone who makes their living as an escort must hate the idea of having to perform a sexual act with someone who is distasteful to them personally. I mean there is only so much that money can do to hide the fact that you are going to have sex with someone you would not even give the time of day to out in the real world.
I know they are getting paid for the act but I also think no still means no even in that kind of situation. George will be sentenced on January 16th.
Well its the risk you take as a "professional". This is not a dating service you don't get paid to sleep with people you find attractive, you get paid to have sex, plain and simple. If the guy was not feeling George at the door, he should have turned on his heels and left. The fact that he came into his home, is a bit off to me.
ReplyDeleteI really do hope he gets what's coming to him but I get the feeling he'll probably walk - meaning he'll get some stupid probation thing because he's a celeb and the escort was "only" an escort. I hope not though. He deserves to be locked up.
ReplyDeletemaybe he was expecting the Karma Chameleon hair style not the Telly Salvas look
ReplyDeleteIs that a Star of David tattoo on his head?
ReplyDeleteIt's still horrific for someone to be forced into a sex act against their will, whether or not sex is a business for them. It's not just "not getting paid for it" - it's emotionally devastating. Rape among prostitutes is a big problem that doesn't get taken seriously by most people. :(
ReplyDeleteEven when you are being paid, you can't always tell at the door that things will turn badly.It's really not that different from a date-rape case. Even if the escort agreed to things in the beginning, George should have been present enough to know when the guy wanted out.
ReplyDeleteWe had a similar case happen in this area, in which a man took his "escort" to his sister's house (his sister was on vacation elsewhere), then proceeded to tie the guy up and violate him. At some point, the "escort" apparently no longer felt safe. He got himself loose, and ended up shooting the guy. He then ran out into the street to chase down a passerby to call the police for him.
The state's attorney decided not to file charges in the case. Incidentally, the guy who had been killed had served probation several years earler in a kidnapping case in which he had done something similar to another young man.
The judge said BG can expect to serve jail time.
ReplyDeleteGeorge's story is that he picked up the guy on gaydar.com 3 months before. They got together and nude photos were taken which were then stolen off BG's laptop. BG lured the guy back to punish him. That was the defence - George refused to give evidence.
George paints all sorts of things on his head. He's catholic, so probably not a Star of David.
I wasn't following Boy George story but was there enough evidence to prove what he did to the guy or was it his word against the escort or vice versa?
ReplyDeletems_w: that's not really a good alibi, that just changes it from unlawful imprisonment to torture.
ReplyDeleteI wish ask_a_hooker was still around, I'd like to hear her take on it.
Honestly, people may look ok at the door, but then creep you out when you get inside. That's probably what happened. Anyhoo, the guy had the right to refuse anything. He could have refunded the money. Boy Loser did it to control.
ReplyDeleteDNfrmMN - Ihaven't read all the details, but I don't think sex took place. The false imprisonment was the handcuffing to the bed, but why he wasn't charged with actual bodily harm isn't clear.
ReplyDeleteThere are going to be repercussions for BDSM enthusiasts from this.
i don't know about this one. it was reported that the escort was picked for this particular reason because that is what he 'specializes in' and he apparently didn't agree on the rate once he saw it was someone famous and wanted more than the settled amount.
ReplyDeletethere are 2 sides to every story.
After escort guy escaped, he ran to the local newsagent for help, dressed only in his boxers. The newsagent said he had cuts and wheals. Even if the escort was experienced, there has to be agreement about how far things go. It is one person's word against another, but the court heard all the story and convicted George.
ReplyDeleteIve checked - the only charge was false imprisonment, so the bodily harm was not an issue. Probably because of the difficulty of deciding consent.
If he didn't want to have sex with him in the first place, why did he go back?
ReplyDeleteThere will be a civil trial, if that's allowed in Great Britain, I honestly don't know. Maybe the guy is expecting to get some money from him. Just putting it out there, have no idea if Boy George has much money anymore.
Off this particular topic but on the topic of "No Means No" - I would like your opinion of this scenario:
ReplyDeleteWife is awoken in the middle of the night by husband having sex with her. Wife is disturbed, particularly because wife has been raped before when passed out years ago.
Next day, wife talks to husband about what happened and husband insists wife made advances that lead husband to believe sex was consensual. Wife remembers nothing. Wife reminds husband that she has sleeping disturbances and they work out plan to make sure this situation doesn't happen again. New futon purchased, husband knows that wife is not planning sex in middle of night and will not engage in sexual activity with wife in middle of the night.
A week later, wife is awoken in the middle of the night by husband having sex with her. Wife is very disturbed and husband's only response is "I really thought you were awake this time."
Was no not clear in this case? What do you think - this is very important to me. Thanks.
I'm not sure how he will do in prison--He probably will need to be separated from the general population based on his history, but I'm not sure if that will happen.
ReplyDeletelol DN you always say that, but I've never left! Still here! I just don't say much, heh heh.
ReplyDeleteI don't know if my opinion really matters in this, there isn't a whole lot to say. I don't think the escort was trying to leave and was restrained. I'm the type of gal that if I sense something is up, I get out quickly. Most who have been in the game long enough, or even a short time, know that this is the best route. Being selective about who you are going to fuck isn't a game that escorts are normally allowed to play. Those that do get pictures of their clients beforehand. No, I'm fairly certain the man WAS up to no good...but that doesn't mean that Boy George handled it the right way.
To dbfreak: If the wife has said "Under no circumstances, no matter how awake I seem, do not have sex with me." and then he does anyway--oooh boy, I hesitate to call that rape, but if the wife says that before hand...well...at the very least the husband is completely disrespecting her wishes and boundaries and she should separate herself from him. Putting it in black and white, he had sex with her when she asked him not to. Sounds like rape to me.
ReplyDeleteTo dbfreak: Maybe he isn't fully awake. My ex used to be very excitable during the night. He was concerned about it but I assured him it was NOT a problem! If it is a problem, I recommend twin beds.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your responses, Ask A Hooker and missdaisy. Both have been helpful.
ReplyDeleteHa, DN & AaH, didn't you have this same exchange just a few weeks ago? :)
ReplyDeleteDB, at the very least, it is a serious breach of trust. I assume that husband is aware of previous rape, and given that, it's hard to believe that he just doesn't get it. It reminds me of a "Dear Abby" I read about a man who used tickling to torture his kids/grandkids and kept insisting he thought they enjoyed it because they laughed. (As if they could help themselves.) My dad did that to a lesser extent when I was a kid, and I still have such a visceral reaction at the memory, I can't imagine how much worse it would be if it were sexual. It's all about control. If possible, wife should definitely talk with a professional who can help figure out what's really going on and help find a solution. If you'd like to talk about it more, feel free to click on my name & email me.
missdaisy, is this "ex" you mention single, and where does he live? I would cross the country for some of that!
ReplyDeleteI am indiscreet today. Sorry.
dbfreak:
ReplyDeletenot something i talk about often, but i WAS raped, twice, by the first asshole i married. he also knew about the childhood molestation i had gone through, and with him it was about control. the second time he did it, he got me pregnant, because he rightly suspected i was about to leave him.
beyond that, i'd rather not use this forum to discuss it further, but rape is rape, if the act is not consensual.
the same goes for working girls and boys, i believe. if the situation gets hinky, i don't care if they're getting paid for it or not. just my opinion.
People do all kinds of crazy shit in their sleep. Is is possible that she's initiating and he's responding while neither are fully awake? By the time they both wake fully, the act is already happening?
ReplyDelete