Monday, December 22, 2008

But It's Ron Jeremy


Ron Jeremy was allegedly attacked by a pap while eating dinner over at Mel's Diner. No, not the Mel's Diner from Alice which really should have been called Alice's Restaurant, but a different one. Ron was eating one of his six hamburgers. What can I say? The guy can eat and I think he learned a very long time ago that the porn industry was not hiring him for his good looks. The pap in question walked up to Ron and allegedly pepper sprayed Ron in the face. I say allegedly because of course the guy could very well be innocent. I mean it could have been water that he sprayed which made Ron cry like that or it could have not been anything at all and Ron just happened to have a can of pepper spray in his pocket.

Seeing that he had the chance to get a pap sent to prison, at the exact same moment that the pap brought up the can to allegedly spray, Ron threw down his burger, reached in his pocket, and sprayed his own face. He had been practicing this moment for years and it finally paid off. All the years of training and this was his moment. The pap never had a chance. The cops came and the pap was arrested for criminal use of tear gas.

I'm guessing what really happened is this pap guy auditioned for a porn shoot, and didn't get hired. So, he pulled a Tonya Harding. He was hoping that perhaps Ron would be so disfigured that the pap would get the role. Again, Ron is not hired for his looks Mr. Pap Guy.

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