About Damn Time

Some of you may have been wondering wtf was going on Friday afternoon. No, Four For Friday and everything late. Well, believe me, if you saw some of the peen that I decided to not post on FFF, you would not have had the stomach to worry about any missing blind items. Friday just happened to be a very busy day for me and I also had to leave work early to catch a flight and so things just got frantic at the last minute.

Normally I don't really talk about my trips unless it is to Vegas or some other suitable place of debauchery, but this time I thought I would share a little something. It all started a few weeks ago when I found out I was going to have to go to Vancouver for business. I don't really like flying much anymore because I have been shunned to the two seat section. For those of you who are wonderfully thin, it means the airline makes me buy two seats so some poor thin person doesn't have to get stuck next to me.

Anyway, once I knew I was going to Vancouver, FW told me that I had to finally meet jax. As a frequent reader, FW knows all about jax and said if I was going to be in Vancouver, that the least I could do was to ask her if she wanted to go to lunch. FW is good that way. She has manners and grace and I don't. Before I get into lunch with jax, I need to say that I finally caved and told FW how I felt about her. It was a hard thing to do because FW has a lot going on in her life and certainly doesn't need me to complicate things. I want to make her life easy, but a 400 pound man with six ex wives carries a lot of baggage. FW has a very nice, safe existence right now and getting together with me, is not necessarily a joy worth experiencing.

I think another issue is I have this blog and she reads it. I can say what I want and she really can't. I'm a very big guy, and an adult and am going into this with hope, but again, I bring a lot to the table. If it doesn't work out, it is not FW's fault. It would be 100% mine. I really hope that someday she will write something on here. She is probably the most amazing person I have ever met in my life. She puts up with so much crap from me and so much of my drama, but is always there. Any mistakes that have ever been made in our friendship have all been mine.

Wow, that was more than I intended. And, I know all of you want to hear about lunch. So, I e-mailed jax and she was all for it. One of my friends was going to be visiting Vancouver and agreed to go so that way there wouldn't be any awkward pauses. Well, for some reason Friday night I got my drunk on. I know, I know, but I found myself at a Denny's at 7am, and drinking wine straight from the bottle in my hotel room at 8am. My friend came over around 11 because she wanted to take me to this cool place called Bacchus. Of course there we drank a bottle of champagne and I had two or three other drinks and the next thing you know I am 30 minutes late for my lunch with jax.

Well, lunch started out at the art gallery where we could test the waters in a public place, and frankly it is good for me to walk sometimes. I don't exercise much. So, the three of us walked and talked and looked at feminist exhibit which seemed to feature an inordinate number of female sexual organs in very large sizes.

But, then it was time for lunch. My friend knew of a place that had great drink specials, so we went to some place called Cactus Cafe and my friend and I blew through six drinks each and a massive amount of food while jax just sipped her one drink biding her time. Waiting to pounce.

Well, I guess the plan was to get me hammered, and my tongue loose and jax wanted to be sober for that. Four hours of questioning later, another 5 drinks and a waitress who looked like Reese Witherspoon in Election and about as f**king cheery and it was time for my nap. So, they rolled me out to a cab and shoved me inside. I have to say that I loved meeting jax, and that I appreciate her and all of you that make this such a great place to be everyday. I don't even remember everything I said or revealed, but do know when I left I was sweating even more than normal. So, you never know. If I have some business in your city, you never know when you might get an e-mail asking you out to lunch too.