I Want Initials
One of the issues that invariably arises when I have friends who read the blog is they want initials. If they are mentioned in the blog they want initials. Well for the most part it just would not be practical to give everyone initials because I can't remember them all and I have to go back and look and then everyone who reads the blog can't keep track. So, it has been awhile since I actually gave out initials. But, last night, I caved. I know, I know, but when my best friend came over she brought Krispy Kremes. Two dozen of them. I'm a sucker for them. She said she was happy and everything to be mentioned in the blog and appreciated The Lovely Bones rant, but she wanted initials. Basically anyone who voluntarily comes to my house, can make my mom actually smile and dodge an ass grab from my dad deserves something. Not that my dad does it to everyone. I mean she may be my best friend, but I am still going to take a look if you know what I mean.
Anyway she came over because she thought she was going to get to watch 90210 upstairs where you can breathe. It's much better now that mom got one of those fans to blow her cigarette smoke out of the way. But, what she got instead was a fat man crying. Last night, when I got home from work, I tripped over something and fell really hard onto my bed, and it broke. Not usually a big deal right? Well I have a water bed and it is old and has been patched up a lot, but apparently the patches finally gave weigh as well as a great deal of water.
I love that bed. I have had it as long as I can remember. Sure, it was impossible to get out of it each morning and as I rediscovered when I moved back home, the sounds of the water make me get up much more frequently to pee than is really fun, but I had missed it while I had been gone so it was worth it. I remember when I got it, I thought it was the greatest thing ever. It was also the time I moved from a bedroom upstairs to the basement because of the chance of a leak. A teenager living in the basement with a water bed. I was cool. Now that is has been many decades and I am back in the same place, it doesn't seem as cool anymore.
While I was mopping up the mess, FW (her new initials) came over and listened as I told stories about the water bed and all the stories about it and other things that have happened in my past. I know all of you find it funny or extremely sad that I am back in a basement at home at my age, but even though I make fun of it, it is not exactly the place I want to be. So, FW got to listen to me ramble and offered some great advice, which is why of course she is my best friend. That and lots of other reasons. I think the water bed breaking was a good thing, and instead of just permanently moving to the futon, or buying a new bed, I think that I need to try and get out of the basement and move on again with my life. When you are back living at home it is kind of like your life just doesn't move forward because although you have a real job, you are still living under the roof of your parents, and so you kind of seem to be in some really weird parallel dimension.
So, for helping me come to that understanding and for not screaming at the mouse that scampered across the floor, FW gets initials. Now, I just need to find a new place to live and a company that still makes water beds.
RIP Water Bed. you will be missed.
ReplyDeletedude, let the water bed go. whatever you do, do not buy a tempurpedic. too damn hard and a rip off to boot. no one needs to sleep on a bed that firm.
ReplyDeleteAww Ent, no matter how crappy your day is, just remember you have all of us who love you!!
ReplyDeleteA) I love my Tempurpedic
ReplyDeleteB) You moved back home? I know housing prices in LA are high, but....
I too, am a huge fan of the memory foam.
ReplyDeleteAnd I do not buy the whole "I'm fat and live in my mom's basement" -story.
"Successful lawyer" just has a better ring to it...*L*
"Now, I just need to find a new place to live..."
ReplyDeleteI have a spare bedroom. ;) Or you could share mine if you don't mind a big dog who thinks she's entitled to 90% of the bed. You wouldn't mind that it was 45 degrees here last night, would you? I promise I'd keep you warm!
p.s. If you can afford it, you should consider getting a loft in the downtown area. I think it would suit you. (The "successful lawyer" persona, that is.) :)
ReplyDeleteHarriet, I don't buy it either. And Mooshki, I would think that such a big guy would enjoy some cooler weather. Not so much sweating. :)
ReplyDeleteOooh, good point, Bmini! :) We may not have many movie stars for Enty to represent, but our music scene is pretty hopping.
ReplyDeletei have some initials too:
ReplyDeletewtf
Molly, don't you dare scare Enty away from this kind of post - they are my favorites! (Along with the super-snarky ones.)
ReplyDeleteI've always wanted a water bed, at least you have the memories :)
ReplyDeletejust be glad you weren't drunk and drowned when that bed gave weigh...(get it? weigh?)...yeah, I've been drinking...`
ReplyDeletemooshki, i don't think anything scares enty and i'm pretty sure he'd laugh if he read the post. donchya think?
ReplyDeleteBut are there any donuts left?
ReplyDeleteI hope so, Molly. :)
ReplyDeleteAdrian, it depends. With Krispy Kremes, if they're still hot, there are NEVER any left, but if they've cooled off there's not much point in eating them.
Moooski, I never met a Krispy Kreme I didn't like--fresh or stale. They opened 4 Krispy Kremes by me, & closed them within a few years. But I outsmarted them. I found one in Conneticut, & now evertime we travel back & forth from Mass., we pick up 2 dozen.
ReplyDeleteLast week we were unloading our car up at Amherst, & all these people kept asking us where the Krispy Kreme was. I kicked myself for not bringing up a gross & selling them on the street. Not do for a fix until Christmas week. :(
spelled your name wrong-sorry. I was thinking of Caramel donuts.
ReplyDeletemooshki - I believe he does live in a loft downtown (ya know, the "successful lawyer)."
ReplyDeleteOh, and all you have to do is nuke the Krispy Kremes (I know, I know, it's not really the same) as hot out of the oven, but sometimes we have to make do.
Really, ent. Sry about ur bed n all... but my guess is that you have made up the whole persona you claim to be. You are probably a number-cruncher from pasadena, or a law student -who indeed lives at home with mentioned alchy mother- but whose mother needs you there and since you're single you let her lean on you.
ReplyDeleteCuz, really, by giving any kind of description of your life and appearance it could bait you out to any celebs who do happen to check out the site and see themselves as a BI or rant.
"Heyyy, that's MY lawyer!!!"
I wonder if this was that "perfect day" Ent had on his facebook.
ReplyDeleteNow who's FW? The only woman I remember being in the Lovely Bones rant was Rachel Weisz.
surfer--nuking definitely works with the plain, not filled. That's why we eat the filled ones first.
ReplyDeleteUgh, every store in Minnesota had Krispy Kremes for a year or two. I was happy when they went away again. I was going to say their overexpansion was one of the worst business mistakes in recent history, but then I remembered the mortgage industry. :)
ReplyDeletep.s. I love your new profile pic, Adrian. :)
ReplyDeleteAwe Ent. You just need to find a new wife - then you'd have a new bed.
ReplyDeletethanks-- I was missing the cereal of my youth. Next I will try King Vitamin.
ReplyDeleteI cave. I'm going to have to add him on Facebook now *sigh*
ReplyDeleteCool post; I really like your vibe. FW seems to have an amazing effect on you.
ReplyDeleteI moved back home for a year once and it was FAN-TASTIC: Gourmet home cooked meals; house was always stocked with the good liquor; a pool AND a jacuzzi (sp?); the sound of waves crashing against the coast lulling me to sleep every night; 2 organic outdoor markets from which to choose nearby; offers to do my laundry or pick up my dry cleaning; invitations to weekend getaways. Since I was working full time and had no bills to pay, I was able to afford a personal trainer, University classes just for fun, I was able to take the car in for its regular checkups and such PLUS I had access to the 'rents cars and their gas cards! It was like an incredibly long and much needed vacation but it always felt like a break from my real life, you know? And I needed to get back to my real life.
Real life: FFF
i think El has a crush on his best friend...(sing songy)
ReplyDeleteLOL @ Molly!
ReplyDeletelol, sorry ea, i get lost when enty rambles sometimes.
ReplyDeletegee, enty, i don't have a spare room, but we'll set you up a tent while the weather's still decent, the pool is still warm, the spa heats quickly. although, you'll have to share the tent with mr. bunny's new telescope.
ReplyDeletewhen the weather turns (as it will in the high desert) he will be putting in a mini-observatory. you can join me on my diet,then you'll fit with the telescope, you can have your computer by your side, single cup coffee brewer in the "main" house, and you're only a little bit farther from your clients.
the other girls will fly out from time to time to help with your care and feeding, and DD's medical assistant and red cross cert. are all up to date.
:)
oh. krispy kreme folded up here. but we have a lovely italian restaurante that makes killer cannoli, my personal favorite.
double :)!!
bunny kisses!
FW= future wife
ReplyDeleteLove Krispy Kreme, but NOT the prices they charge for them here in the UK. £1.39 for a single donut, £12.99 for a dozen. Rip.Off.
ReplyDeleteWaterbeds always remind me of that scene in Edward Scissorhands. I wouldn't have one, in case I had a visitor who was a man-made freak with blades for fingers! As you do.
I think you are right on the money scum kid! What with the 'new initials' comment.
ReplyDeletegood for you for moving forward. i think that making a goal is fun, accomplishing the goal is funner, but achieving the goal is a pain in the ass so....... i wish you luck in the days leading up to your big move in. i am proud of you enty.
ReplyDeletelove jasmine