How Convenient

This has got to be the worst all time excuse in the history of excuses. According to US Weekly, Jennifer Lopez injured her foot and so cannot judge the finale of Project Runway. Umm, she would be sitting in a chair. Is the foot so bad that she is unable to sit down? Is she going to have to be fully horizontal for the next six months? Does the foot radiate extreme pain when it hears a German accent or Michael Kors and his Dr. Phil fashion-isms?

You know what this is about don't you? It has nothing to do with Project Runway. Nope. The thing is the injury has to be serious enough so that she doesn't have to do the triathlon. See, Jennifer already made the rounds of all the talk shows and got all the magazine covers she was going to get out of this little charade without actually doing it. If she did it, she would probably get another round of publicity. She probably thought, "screw it. People are going to think I did it because I talked about it for a month." She's right you know. People are going to remember her talking about it and assumed she did.

She might not even make an announcement expressing her regret that she is unable to participate because then that would tarnish the memory. Oh, and I also think this foot injury will prevent her from ever competing in any future triathlons. It will be only with great difficulty and personal pain and rehabilitation that she will be able to continue shopping on any kind of regular basis, or appearing in films. Unfortunately, due to the injury she will no longer be able to take care of the kids personally and will hand them over to a team of nannies who will remind her when a birthday is coming up so she can make an appearance at before limping back to her wing of the house. That is of course if the children are staying in the house. By then, they may be secluded with Connor and Isabella who will be writing a Broadway Musical of Battlefield Earth.

The photo above was taken on September 10th, so obviously it has happened since then. I would like to think that she would not use a 9/11 reference when discussing her injury, but with her penchant for publicity, you just never know.