I Got You Babe

You may want to throw away your television after you hear about this one. Seems that Fox thought it would be a good idea to let the Osbournes do a variety show ala Sonny and Cher. Yep, for at least six hours, the people of the world will be treated to Ozzy Osbourne singing I got You Babe each week with Sharon Osbourne and Jack and Kelly pairing off singing I'm A Little Bit Country. Ahh, television just doesn't get much more entertaining.

The crazy thing is FOX won the right to air the show after a bidding war ensued. Look, I enjoyed the first season of their show on MTV, but it was more because I wanted a look inside their life. I really have no desire to remember Ozzy Osbourne as a guy who embarrasses what is left of his career by watching him sing with a bunch of people headed for The Surreal Life or to watch him read cue cards as they do sketches. The only way on earth I would watch the show is if it were live with no 7 second delay. Now, that would be entertaining.

As it is though, I can just see Ozzy coming out in some Elvis jumpsuit or Kelly and Jack in matching sequined outfits trying to get themselves a little more money and restarting their 15 minute clock. Speaking of which, here is a question for you. Does the 15 minute clock start again or does it just get stretched out? I think we would all agree that Jack had his 15 minutes. Does this now mean that his clock is reset back to 14:30, or because in fact there will be another show he is entitled to more than 15 minutes?

15 minutes I can handle. Six one hour episodes sounds like torture. Oh, and if you think I'm making some kind of sick joke about the whole Donny and Marie or Sonny & Cher takeoff, think again. Fox in their press release said that is exactly how they envision this show. Do you get the feeling that Ozzy has no idea what he is being asked to do and that Sharon is just going to lead him into a set somewhere and have him start reading or singing what she tells him to do?