Thursday, May 22, 2008

You Think Lindsay Lohan Could Do This?


Bollywood actress Maria Monica Susairaj and her boyfriend were arrested in India yesterday. The reason they were arrested is because they allegedly decided to get all Sopranos on a guy who was having an affair with Maria. Maria apparently decided to prove her love to her Navy officer boyfriend by allegedly helping him murder the guy she was sleeping with. Wow, she must have seen FFF and realized she was being short changed.

The couple were not content with your random shoot and kill. No, they wanted to send a message. I don't know who they were sending the message to, but the dead guy had been burned, his head decapitated, and the rest of his body was sliced into pieces small enough for a stir fry. Three hundred pieces to be exact.

The body was found in a jungle about three days after he was reported missing. I don't know what kind of jungles they have in India, but I would have thought that the pieces of the body would have been a little harder to find, or eaten, or something. Don't they have tigers in India? Oh, maybe they heard about Oprah going vegan for the next three weeks and decided upon themselves that if vegan was good enough for Oprah, then for sure it was good enough for them.

I'm trying to think of an actress that I could see doing this. Honestly I would have to go with Denise Richards. I would have put her in the headline, but she has been in the news way too much lately. I think Lindsay could do it under the right circumstances. Oooh, Jada Pinkett Smith could do it.



11 comments:

  1. Dare I ask why Oprah's going vegan?

    Guess no one told her she's going to have to stop wearing leather and wool for the next three weeks, too.

    We (real vegans) don't need your "jump on the bandwagon" brand of veganism, O. Don't TRY being a vegan. BE a vegan.

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  2. Could the Jada mention possibly answer a previous blind? Yummy!

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  3. I'm sick of Oprah and all her "do this and do that". She can take her steel cut oatmeal and shove it. I'm having a steak.

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  4. If you read on the Indian news websites, they're reporting that the boyfriend of Monica was suspicious of her cheating after a phone call and flew over to her house to check out the situation. Ten minutes later he had stabbed Grover 4 times. They...I don't even know what word to describe the act...to his body to destroy all evidence.

    Why do I know so much about this?

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  5. I follow Bollywood pretty closely and I have never heard her name. She might be an actress but she is not a star.

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  6. Oh, sorry so she is a Kannada actress. Still not Bollywood though, not every film that comes from India is Bollywood. Not interesting or relevant, I know :)

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  7. i wonder how they got their knives sharp enough to do that?? rachel ray eat your heart out!

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  8. Dear O.J.,


    Have I got a gal for YOU!

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  9. small enough for a stir fry? damn thats a hell of a visual EL.

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  10. LOL, Ragdoll. Cairbre, given the size of Indian film industry, I think it is important to know these things. Thank you. By the way, if you know, what's the penalty is for murder there?
    Who the f*ck cares what Oprah eats?
    Yes, Enty, Jada COULD do it - all by herself.

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  11. majik: shut the hell up, you pretentious dickwad.

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