Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Ready To Wed And Wed Are Totally Different Things


OK! Magazine this week has the huge headline that Reese and Jake are ready to wed. I think all of us are ready to wed. If you are single or even if you aren't and the right person came along, I would think all of us are ready to wed.

Wouldn't you know it? You read the article and there isn't a damn thing in there about the plans for the wedding or where it is going to be at. Hell, according to the article they aren't even formally engaged. Oh, those are the words of their source, not mine. Seems that Reese and Jake are saying that it won't be long before Jake pops the question to Reese.

So, let me get this straight. Not preparing for a wedding, not engaged, doesn't appear that they have even talked about it, but they are ready to wed. But wait, it gets better. A source at the restaurant where they ate said the pair couldn't keep their eyes off each other. Not their hands or their mouths or their tongues. Their eyes.

You know what that is? That's not true love, that's being polite. Unless you are scared of someone, when you are seated across from someone and eating, it is generally considered bad form to keep your eyes down and on your food. Couldn't take their eyes off each other. Where were they supposed to put them? I guess the fact that they weren't both staring at the ass of the waiter is a positive step, but is hardly worthy of marriage talk.

Oh, and the friend wants the world to know that Reese would never live with Jake prior to marrying him, because as the friend puts it, "Reese is very conservative and traditional. I'm sure she doesn't want her kids to see her 'living in sin.'"

No, that would be terrible. Ummm. Doesn't Ryan actually live with someone? So yeah, that point kind of goes out the window. Anyway, if you need a good laugh and a great lesson in how to get people at the checkout line to pick up your magazine, this is excellent.