Hollywood psychic Kenny Kingston has claimed that Reese Witherspoon and Jake Gyllenhaal were destined to fall in love. Well I'm destined to fall in love with a supermodel if I can come up with enough cash. Hell, we're all destined if we can do that.
Kenny, who I think is still pissed off because he missed out on the whole dial a psychic and waste your money 900# scam says that Reese and Jake first met in a past life. Oh yes, it's true. She was a nurse and Jake was a doctor during World War One. In between treating patients, they fell in love.
At some point Jake was called up to a more active role in the war to help out all the guys in the trenches. I guess Jake was there to make sure that all the guys were really given some one on one medical services. Really get at the root of whatever problems they might be having and to be there to inject them with what they needed. As a result of Jake's active duty, the lovers had their destiny interrupted.
Kenny says that now they have a chance to correct destiny and to be together as lovers and to work together again as well. Oh, they're working together all right. I think all this is just some kind of fantasy Kenny uses in his mind to be able to fall asleep each night, but my commentary is probably a little more PG than the R fantasy Kenny has.
Kenny, who I think is still pissed off because he missed out on the whole dial a psychic and waste your money 900# scam says that Reese and Jake first met in a past life. Oh yes, it's true. She was a nurse and Jake was a doctor during World War One. In between treating patients, they fell in love.
At some point Jake was called up to a more active role in the war to help out all the guys in the trenches. I guess Jake was there to make sure that all the guys were really given some one on one medical services. Really get at the root of whatever problems they might be having and to be there to inject them with what they needed. As a result of Jake's active duty, the lovers had their destiny interrupted.
Kenny says that now they have a chance to correct destiny and to be together as lovers and to work together again as well. Oh, they're working together all right. I think all this is just some kind of fantasy Kenny uses in his mind to be able to fall asleep each night, but my commentary is probably a little more PG than the R fantasy Kenny has.
Aw, taking a page from the L Ron Hubbard book: if I thought of it, and it just came to me, that means it happened!! Lets write it down!!
ReplyDeleteWhy can't the stars date ordinary, unknown people? Why doesn't Reese date and marry her garbage man? Why doesn't Jake find his true love is a grocery store cashier?
ReplyDelete"She was a nurse and Jake was a doctor during World War One. In between treating patients, they fell in love."
ReplyDeleteIsn't that the plot from Dr. Zhivago?
Is KK still alive or phoning this in from the great beyond?
ReplyDeleteAlways, always loved the squirrel's ass on his head.
Hmmm,
ReplyDelete"one-on-one"..."root"...inject"...
So Reese was his beard in the past life, too?
" to be there to inject them with what they needed"
ReplyDeleteLove it.
jm, because stars only fall in love with stars. it reads better in their biographies once they croak.
ReplyDeletehey i'd date him to if he was paying me 1 million dollars - for that i'd even give some PDA
ReplyDeleteLOL
ReplyDeleteLOL
ReplyDeleteWhat? No corresponding commentary from Madame Cleo or Dionne and her psychic friends?
ReplyDeleteAnyway Ent, this has to be the closest you've ever come to completely outing Jake.
Do *your* psychic friends say there's a revelation coming?
total beard...otherwise we woudl see them out by now..shit even tom n katie started to come out publicly this far in to prove their love. double snort.
ReplyDeleteDidn't James McEvoy and Kiera Knightly just basically do that the last half of Atonement?
ReplyDelete