Ted C. Blind Item
Dangling Wrangler’s at it again. You know Dangle-babe: He’s the base-boy the whole world seems to love no matter how many episodes he efs up, (via himself, the law or the ladies). Indeed, the Dangle dude’s been in trouble myriad times with too many drugs, too many women who were married to other men or by just being a plain ol’ mean, drunk bastard.
Therefore, the publicist’s quick fix was required (rehab and several staged photo shoots with Dangling looking brow-furrowed and fine with fans and such). Worked for a bit. But, then—as usually happens when one cleans up for a press release instead of for a personal mission—Dangling’s not only back to the booze and slut races, he’s hitting the hard drugs more than ever. Looks like crap, too. But the gals don’t seem to mind—they actually like screwing a famous guy who’s good (for about five minutes these days) with his huge, never-washed zucchini.
Alas, even the quickie quickies don’t do it for D.W. any more. Could that be why he’s getting so bored with dumpee broad after dumpee babe that he’s now secretly courting his latest unluckiest girlfriend’s (very underage) daughter?
Why the hell don't people like this ever get caught? No, in Hollywood, they get Oscars, don’t they?
I'm starting to get a headache...
ReplyDeleteAnd it Aint's:
ReplyDeleteRobert Downey Jr.
Jack Nicholson
Christian Slater
Kiefer?
ReplyDeleteOscar winner right?
ReplyDeleteRobin Williams maybe?
Keifer's never been to rehab that I know of...and not really an a-hole.
ReplyDeleteHow about Mel Gibson???
ReplyDeleteI thought colin farrel .. but he never won an oscar did he?
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteWhew, thanks for the aint's. I thought it might be RDJ. I really want him to stay sober.
ReplyDeletebenecio del torrio got an oscar...jquain phoneix got an oscar
ReplyDeleteHas Colin Farrel ever won or nominated for an Oscar?
ReplyDeleteNikki,
ReplyDeletePhoenix was nominated (twice BSA - Gladiator and BA - Walk the Line) but never won an Oscar.
I'm thinking Mel Gibson. Old enought to have that ick factor for dating someone's daughter, Oscar winner, re-hab, lots of other troubles. However do we know if he is hung like a zuccini?
ReplyDeleteJoaquin Phoenix does not have an Oscar - he was nominated, though. And it doesn't necessarily say the person has an Oscar or was nominated.
ReplyDeleteI was thinking Colin Farrell..
I know it's slightly off topic, but he IS an "and it ain't" . . .
ReplyDeleteI saw an episode of Futurama last night that had a scene at the Oscars. Joan Rivers' head announced, at one point, "And there's Jack Nicholson's DNA reconstituted in a gorilla!" In walks a gorilla that looks quite like old Jacky, with two young women on his arms. Genius.
And he is on Sociallite Life getting texting and driving. He looks pretty crappy!
ReplyDeleteCould it be Matt McConaughey? He has a movie coming out called "Surfer Dude" and that could be the Dude reference. Just a thought.
ReplyDeleteAnd he is on A Socialite's Life getting busted texting and driving. He looks pretty crappy!
ReplyDeleteSean Penn?
ReplyDeleteBack to Matt McConaughey, he played David Wooderson in the movie Dazed and Confused. That is the D.W.
ReplyDeleteAdrien Brody
ReplyDeletei have 2 theories :
ReplyDelete1) robin williams - oscar winner, beat out by RD Jr for role in Chaplin, beat Jack for the Oscar and voiced a movie with christain slater
or
2) Nick Nolte - lots of drug issues, starring with RD JR in Tropic Thunder but not sure of connections to the others.
Kiefer has actually been to court-ordered rehab quite a few times. I don't even know how many DUIs he's had. It's just that between seasons, he drops off the radar so what he does isn't reported widely.
ReplyDeleteAnd while I do love my Kief, I can't even tell you the number of stories I've heard about him getting into drunken brawls and getting thrown out onto the street. And, after every stint in rehab, jail, whatever, he suddenly looks fab and amazing and pictures of him are everywhere, smiling and charming.
On the other hand, it probably is more like an Oscar contender, gien the last line of the BI.
Still, I just thought I'd toss that out there.
I would go w/ nick nolte
ReplyDeletedef not mel gibson -- personal connection and while he might be a mean anti-semitic drunk, he's definitely not after underage girls, nor does he have a girlfriend (strictly catholic, would not cheat on wife)
-uj
OR gary busey
ReplyDeletehe's in the news today for being crazy etc
uj
duncanpowers, as you said Keifer always looks good, Ted C says this guy is looking like crap. This lifestyle is taking it's toll. I still believe Oscar winner too.
ReplyDeleteLots of good guesses I hadn't thought of. Kiefer, Colin, and Joquin (sp?) fit except for the Oscar thing, if Ted C. means that he won an Oscar. The problem with Matthew McC., in my reading, is he is too clean-living overall and he's with his pregnant model girlfriend who doesn't have a daughter period, let alone near the underage range for him to exploit.
ReplyDeleteMel Gibson is not universally loved - in fact, it's the opposite. This guy sounds like he just keeps getting passes for his bad behavior and the public still loves him.
Who is lovable, attractive, single, yet has whispers of bad behavior, rudeness, arrests and drug use, looks hard AND won an Oscar?
By the way, can we all agree that Ted C. is hard to read and not repeatedly comment on that like happens every time Ent posts these?
Billy Bob Thornton??
ReplyDeleteMy first thought was Kiefer. It says "no matter how many episodes he effs up"...makes me think his behavior messed up some episodes of a TV show...like 24.
ReplyDeleteAlso the name "Wrangler"...as in Cowboy...as in SOUTHerland.
There was a blind item from Ent awhile back about an actor who brought his teenage date to a premiere but also brought his teenaged daughter so people would think his date was just a friend of his daughter's. I thought it was Kiefer.
ReplyDeleteI don't think Kiefer has ever effed up an episode. I've heard that no matter what he gets up to in his personal life, he is a complete professional on the set.
ReplyDeleteWhat the heck does "base-boy" mean? Was he in a baseball movie? I would say Charlie Sheen, but he's got no ex w/ teen kids...I think Keifer sounds about right...
ReplyDeleteI'm still sticking with Matt McConaughey. He drove a Jeep Wrangler in the move "Sahara" and the "Oscar" hollywood "gave" him was Penelope Cruz. Just because his model girlfriend is pregnant doesn't mean he couldn't have another girlfriend we don't know of.
ReplyDeleteThe "base boy" comment if referencing a baseball movie could be McConaughey as he was in "Angels in the Outfield".
ReplyDeletejason patrick
ReplyDeleteI thinks its keifer. in addition to the reasons stated by brenda 22there was a blind item a while back that there was an actor who was doing so much blow his face looked drastically different from scene to scene. the guess was keifer. also keifer was dating anna wintour and she definitely has a teenage daughter
ReplyDeleteI beleive the Oscar comment is referring to Roman Polanski...got an Oscar but couldn't be in the US to accept it because he would have been arrested for statutory rape.
ReplyDeletei don't think its Colin, since his son was born with development issues he's quit his bad boy partying skanky ways.
ReplyDeleteoh and he doens't have a big zucchini.
O.k., if it IS Keifer then the base-boy could be a reference to Lost-Boy as in the movie The Lost Boys and the Dangling could refer to him dangling upside down as a vampire in same movie. The Wrangler reference could be to "The Cowboy Way" movie.
ReplyDeleteJust read where Keifer traveled with the rodeo circuit in the late 1990's. There's the Wrangler reference for sure.
ReplyDeleteyou're forgetting Young Guns
ReplyDeleteCouldn't base-boy refer to free-base, as in smoking crack?
ReplyDeleteAlso-I'm rethinking the Oscar thing. Is it possible that it is simply a reference to the way Hollywood treats perverts-like Roman Polanski-who they gave a lifetime acheivement award to or something...
If this is Kiefer, I'm going to be really mad. I've always thought he was a big pussycat. I hope this isn't him, because he has a young daughter and how would he feel? Or maybe he was the blind!
Ugh-Kiefer's first film role was a movie called The Bat Boy!
ReplyDeletehow about Kevin Costner?
ReplyDeleteoh nevermind I guess he's married
ReplyDeleteFor my first post, I will offer this: "good for about five minutes these days" indicates to me that it isn't one of the younger guys like Owen or Matt Mc.
ReplyDeleteThis is going to be a middle aged guy.
Sorry...my bad..first movie was Bay Boy...never mind...
ReplyDeleteBut this is looking very much like KS. Everyone really wants to love him, like I do, and really want to keep giving him passes, i.e., DUI's. I really hope he isn't flushing his life down the toilet and his father can shake some sense into him.
Okay, could it be possible that this person isn't an actor/Oscar winner? I know it's a longshot, but this was screaming Pete Doherty to me:
ReplyDelete- base-boy (free basing as previously mentioned)
- loved no matter how much he efs up, in troule with the law and the ladies
- went to rehab
- looks like crap but still gets the ladies (Doherty dates models!) even with his dirty nasty cock
- can definitely see him lasting five minutes tops
- and can see him getting with young young girls
And that's my two cents.
....or maybe he's only "good for about 5 minutes these days" because the drugs are taking their toll?
ReplyDeleteThe Owen Wilson guess made me wonder, but Owen Wilson was only nominated for an Oscar, and he's not looking any worse (than usual) lately.
I think it's Ben Affleck. I don't know why.
ReplyDeleteLMFAO at the Pete Doherty guess.
ReplyDeleteAnd I'm LMFAO in a good way, not in a making-fun-of-you way, Lumps of Limbo.
If they gave out Oscar nominations for crack consumption, ol' Pete would definitely win, with some serious competition from Amy Whorehouse.
Al Pacino.
ReplyDeleteI have to say Kiefer. He hasn't won an Oscar yet, but the reference Ted C. made is to a movie his father was in (They Shoot Horses, Don't They?).
ReplyDeleteMajik, Pacino was my first thought as well (esp w/ the zucchini reference) but how has he eff'ed up? Has he been in trouble with the law and been to rehab?
ReplyDeleteLeo DiCaprio? Daniel Day Lewis?
ReplyDeleteKeifer was the first to come to my mind when I read this.
ReplyDeleteThis is so obviously Mel Gibson...Oscar winner, alcoholic, drug abuser, chronic adulterer...
ReplyDelete