If The Baby Looks Like 50 Cent, We Will Blame You
By now I'm sure you have heard about the Alba baby shower and how all the guests were given bracelets, sat in a corner and sang Kumbaya. They were then told that in no uncertain terms could they take off the bracelets they had just been given.
Doesn't matter if you are getting married or if you are a surgeon or in a film, you can't take them off. Why? This is what I can't quite figure out. Right now I'm torn between Cash Warren's latest get rich quick scheme where he plans to sell a million of the little bracelets and not have to worry about donating the money to any of those pesky charities that usually are associated with popular color bracelets. I would say I am actually really headed that way. Lets face it. We know Cash is a money grubbing ass who has basically Heather Milled himself into something. Unfortunately for him, Jessica doesn't make as much as a Beatle. Hell, she doesn't make as much as Britney, so Cash has to find new ways to keep himself rich without sharing. Oh, he makes her share, but he ain't sharing.
My other guess which is much more gruesome is that if somehow the baby is born with some type of problem, such as looks nothing like Cash, or has ADD or something, then Cash and Jessica can hunt down whoever took off their bracelet and blame them for their child's misery. Then that person of course will be considered a pariah. It is kind of like the old preacher trick where if someone can't get up, it is not the preacher's fault, it is the fact the injured person didn't have enough faith. In this instance it isn't because Cash is some kind of freak that the baby turned out the way it did, it is because someone took off their bracelet.
i'd laugh my fool ass off if that kid came out with a gap tooth and a fro.
ReplyDeleteI'm wondering if they're making this out to be more than it is. There's a big difference between trying to be cute and asking your guests to keep their bracelets on, and demanding that they do. It could have all very well been intended to be light hearted. Not that I like Alba, I'm just sayin'.
ReplyDeleteAnyone else hear that Asslee IS pregnant? Makes EL's little "slip of the tongue" on his post about their engagment seem prolific, eh?
you know there are rumors that jessica and 50 cents were dating and in love with each other but had to keep it private..so if the baby looks like 50 cents then he is the father...
ReplyDeleteoh if the baby came out looking like 50 it would make my gossip year¡¡¡
ReplyDeleteYeah, and prophetic, too, Trix!
ReplyDeleteI'd tell her to kiss my ass. I might hang it from my rearview mirror or my purse strap, but I'm not keeping a bracelet on 24/7 unless I'm in the hospital.
ReplyDelete^^Hey mandythegreat...
ReplyDelete...or in jail... well a person has no choice in that situation
I can't wait until La Miseralba spawns Fiddy's baby. The attempt at spin will be gossip gold. GOLD I tell ya!
ReplyDeleteThat is rude and tacky.
ReplyDeleteThat is the kind of thing I would just nod and say yes to, and then throw it in the garbage as soon as I got home.