"Push Harder" ----- "Yes Daddy"

If the headline doesn't scare you on its own, I want you to just sit back in your chair and imagine this. I know many of you have children and judging by your comments, most of you must drink the same get pregnant juice as celebrities because you just keep on keeping on. I think that's fantastic, and if everyone wants to have ten kids, then even better. Imagine getting to the hospital on the day of your delivery. The contractions are really setting in now. The nurses are convinced you are actually going to go into labor so they take you to a birthing room, delivery room, labor room, or a 7 Eleven if you are named Britney. Anyway, there you are in the room. Everything is being connected to your body, your significant other is bitching about not being able to find the remote control or not enough channels. You know it's time to start pushing. Normally the nurse would start, and then the doctor would come in a bit later. Cool right? Well what if the nurse was your mom and the doctor was your dad?

That's right, your dad wants to deliver your baby. I know this is something Pimpa might like or Thora Birch's dad, but most fathers would not want to be reaching in to their daughter and saying push a little harder. Well you obviously have not met Nicole Kidman's family. They do that kind of thing. He already delivered Nicole's sister's baby and now he is going to handle the honors in this one. I can just hear the comments now. "Wow, you have been working this thing a little hard. Is this all Keith, or did Lenny have something to do with it?" "I remember like it was yesterday. Me showing you put on a condom and you kept practicing and practicing."

So when you are in that hospital room about to start pushing, and a head drops to between your legs to see how the head is coming, at least when the head pops back up, it won't be your dad telling you to push a little harder. I know I know. Try and fall asleep tonight thinking of that huh?



Thanks Twisted