Could I Have An Arrest Please

This is turning out to be one of the slowest days in gossip news for the past several months. I really don't want to write or read anymore about Jamie Lynn Spears. I don't care what Blair from Facts Of Life has to say about it and I sure don't need to hear another clip of Britney Spears acting even dumber than usual by questioning again whether her sister is really pregnant.

There are no Lindsay Lohan antics and no ridiculous statements from Denise and Charlie. What is a blogger supposed to do? I could write about Sacha Baron Cohen and his killing off of Borat and Ali G, but that sentence would be about the extent of the story.

I did get another e-mail from Gift Clement after our lengthy diatribe towards her. I will be working on a response to her over the weekend. So, I thought I would give everyone a little bit more of what you all love most anyway. Blind Items. Sure, there will be Random Photos later, although I may fall asleep if I have to see any more celebrities on the beach or skiing.

Where is a good lesbian ass grab of Jessica Biel when I need it?

For those of you bored out of your minds over Christmas, I will be doing some posting. I'll be just as bored as you and so could use the distraction. Plus, I heard it is not a good idea to actually drink for four consecutive days without at least a 30 minute break every 4 hours.

AP checked in with me yesterday and offered up the fact that she was at a movie theater recently for a premiere. The place was packed but the A list star of the film, and a number one film it was, spent the second 30 minutes of the film getting serviced first by hand and then by mouth from his companion. They were in the back row, but AP and several other people witnessed the action as they made their way to the bathroom.