Good Morning Australia

While you were sleeping, Jessica Alba decided to let Cash Warren back into her pants and pocketbook. He must be really persuasive. Maybe he should start a cult.

While you were sleeping you missed out on Foxy Brown being sentenced to at least two weeks in jail for violating the terms of her probation. Seems Foxy has a bit of a temper problem when it comes to electronics and a wee bit of a problem being truthful to cops and registering her vehicles. It hasn't kept her from getting knocked up by some unknown guy and she even says she's getting married. That is one brave guy. Not brave, like a guy playing in the AFL and getting kicked in the nuts and continuing to play. Well, actually he probably is that brave because you have to know he's going to get kicked in the balls almost everyday and being married to Foxy is almost like a permanent kick in the balls.

Jenna Jameson, who is trying to become the first disappearing porn-star talked about her retirement from porn and also her breast reduction surgery. She claims she got the breasts removed because it was being true to herself. I think she got them removed because she realized there aren't too many 50 pound people with D cup breasts and they were so heavy in relation to the rest of her body they threatened to always topple her. She may have also had them removed because she had become more plastic than human. Kind of like a real life Barbie doll, but with some kind of weight loss problem and she hasn't been recalled for lead paint.

Beyonce decided to show the world that she's proud of her breasts by exposing them for all the world to see. To actually see her breasts, you are going to need some time and some very good eyesight, but if you concentrate, you can see them flopping around like a dying fish in a boat. If you could see anything I guess it would be NSFW but your boss would have to have absolutely incredible eyesight to even get a hint of nipple.

Kate Moss and Pete Doherty got back together again. Don't be surprised. Most super models do have a thing for former male prostitutes who are, needle tracked, broke, homeless, cheating on you all the time, incoherent, living off your money, hated by all your friends and family and may cause you to lose your child. I'm sure they will be one big, happy, substance abusing family. Oh yes I said family. Seems Kate wants to have Pete's children. I'm sure there won't be any complications with his kids and they should all be healthy drug users when they get older.

Scarlet Johannson wants to adopt. Well she needs to fill that new house she just bought with something. That's a big place for one person and her 400 pound stalker/lawyer/website author. Hopefully she didn't ask Woody Allen for any adoption advice or then she might just adopt some 18 year old boy who likes to call her mama and paints her toe nails.

Is 24 popular in Australia? I have no idea, but anyway, Janeane Garofalo, not to be confused with James Gandolfini even though they have similar looks is set to be in the new season of 24. I actually like Jeneane Garofalo and it's not just because she's getting it on with Henry Rollins or that she made a movie with Denis Leary which I actually thought was funny. I love her because of Larry. Larry Sanders that is. Anyone on that show is gold baby. Gold.

Did you hear that Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes sleep in separate bedrooms? Well, it's true, at least according to Star Magazine. I know that probably doesn't come as too big of a shock if you really stop and think about it. What comes as a shock to me though is that Katie decorated her room in pastels with lots of stuffed animals and a miniature horse carousel which she rides when she's sad. I wonder how many engines have been burned out on that thing. You can read the whole story if you scroll down to earlier today.