Crazy Days and Nights

Now when Ben Affleck compares a colonic to losing his virginity should I read something into that? Last I checked, I used a different part of my anatomy when I lost my virginity. Did he use something different? Just asking.

In the world of Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson there are three camps. No, I am not talking about Pimpa Joe and his ladies. I am talking about those who want Nick and Jessica back together and so all news of either of them being single makes their world a happy place. Then there are the Jessica fans who complain loudly when I say she looked like a drag queen last week. She did. She can be beautiful, but last week she looked like a drag queen. Get over it. Finally, there is the third set of fans who adore Nick and so whenever I say Nick and Vanessa are done, I get a whole bunch of comments from them. SO, you can see whatever I say about either of these two makes someone unhappy. Not to mention you my daily reader who enjoys Pimpa Joe stories as much as anyone, but is tired of Nick and Jessica. So, now, let us go through all the possible combinations.

Jessica and John. Are they a real couple? She thinks they are a real couple. Every guy she has been with since Nick has been the next true love. Jessica goes from relationship to relationship. She is not a dater. John, who I actually think is NOT gay, is having some fun and enjoying the sex, but is the kind of guy who has something to do early the next morning. You can see the look on his face. I loved you last night, but not here in public in front of the cameras. I think his relationship with J. Love Hewitt was real and I actually think he got hurt and is getting back at Jessica now. When he is lonely, he will give Jessica a call. They will NOT be together next year at this time.

Nick and Vanessa. Yes, it is a real relationship. No, they are not getting married anytime soon. They are both having fun when they see each other and it could turn into something serious if one were willing to move. If one of them does not move across the country, then it will fade. I think there is a 20% chance they will be together next year at this time. Look, I like Vanessa. She is always nice to me and I think she is incredibly attractive. They make a good couple, but that does not always mean it will work out. Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz - Hey, you just told the world you go both ways. What do you expect to happen? Pimpa Joe likes watching the ladies. I do not think he into that extra guy thing. I could be wrong though. Ashlee, unlike her sister is a dater and this will probably roll right off her. Can you ever see Jessica dating a guy who admitted they go both ways? Yes, I can see the comments section about John. I do not think Ashlee and Pete are a "couple" and so I think they will still be hanging out next year.

Pimpa Joe and Mrs. Simpson? I think the drawing says it best people. Of course the collage of other photos doesn't hurt either.