Anna Faris is interviewed this month in Marie Claire and some parts of it are refreshing simply because she is the kind of person who does not really care what anyone else thinks about her. I have gone through periods where I was not a fan of her and still think she should not have agreed to do that rape scene in Observe And Report. Rape is not comedy. Ever. In the article she discusses the fact that her first marriage fell apart because she was more famous than her husband. Well, her new husband is not exactly making millions of bucks which is probably why this one is very creaky too. When someone gives a monthly magazine interview rather than a weekly magazine you never know whether that relationship might end before the issue is published.
She says that after her first marriage broke up she decided to get a boob job and drink everyday and just stay inside and never change clothes. She makes it sound funny, but this is fairly common. Most of us wake up every morning and go to a job. We are forced to get up, presumably shower and change clothes and participate in the real world. If you work in movies, you might work for three months and then not work for two. What do you all day? You don't have to do anything so you don't.
She also says she has no actress friends. Well, maybe it is because you said that you would love to be roofied someday. She says that in order to meet actresses she has to call their agents and then set up a meeting and the ones she meets at events are too stuffy. Anyway, I will say that her new movie looks funny and will probably be seen by me on DVD. Oh, and if you have never seen her in Just Friends, you should do that tonight.
I don't find the statement that she would "love to be roofied someday" very funny, either. As someone who's been roofied with consequences, it's NOT fucking funny.
ReplyDeleteAlso, she would be a lot cuter if she didn't inject her lips.
Women can be misogynists, too, and this girl is the female Seth Rogan. She's detestable.
ReplyDeletePerhaps her fellow actresses seem "stuffy" to her because they can't believe what a total fucking moron she is, and they don't really feel like associating with a girl who justified participating in a date rape scene.
Also, I cannot STAND women who claim they don't have many friends of the same gender. They are typically vapid, backstabbing, self-loathing assholes.
next we'll be told she shot JFK and faked the moon landings.
ReplyDeleteI don't get the hate. She's funny. Get over yourselves.
ReplyDeleteShe was awesome in "Just Friends" but then she had her lips and boobs done, did "The House Bunny", and it went downhill from there. She was pretty good in "Lost In Translation" too, remmebr how her character was supposed to be Cameron Diaz?
ReplyDeleteObserve and Report was such a terrible movie that I'm still mad that I saw it. I cannot think of another movie like that.
ReplyDeleteHey Aly - clearly not everyone has the same sense of humour you do. Get over yourself.
ReplyDelete@Elizabeth - I totally agree. Just awful.
I've always thought it was just sad that she seemed to feel that she couldnt be a successful comedienne without doing some plastic surgery and breast augmentation.
ReplyDeleteTo me it was like paving over the road the likes of Phillis Diller, Luicille Ball, Joan Rivers,and Mary Tyler Moore had to carve out with their own trials and tribulations of compromising to make it in such a predominantly men's field.
It just seems like such a shame that when I look at her I see ZERO progress for female commedianes and more of the trying to make mold oneself into a man's point of view of what a barbie type woman should be.
Maybe she has no actress friends because there are some left that see how she transformed herself to fit into this stereotypical niche and feel as annoyed as I do about it. I understand there must have been pressures to conform herself but its still a backwards step for not just female comedians but women who want to make it without using their looks, in general.
though I will say I did like House Bunny and think she is a talented comedic actress. I just dont think the boobs or lips added to any of that talent.
ReplyDeleteI don't like Anna either. I dont think she's funny. I just feel like it comes off like she's trying to hard.
ReplyDeleteI liked her in Entourage when she played herself because she wasn't trying to be funny for once.
@Ida - I don't agree with the generalizations though that women that don't have female friends are vapid, backstabbing assholes. I don't have alot of female friends and I'm none of those things. I have my two best girl friends that I've known since high school and I'm friendly with other girls, but girls bring drama. Lots of it. And I don't have the patience for that. I have much more fun when my husband's friends come over and we watch football and drink beer or play cards. I've never been a girly girl. I don't wear dresses, I don't spend hours getting ready to go out. I like sports, I can fix things myself, and I'm a college educated senior financial analyst. I'm definitely not vapid. And my two girl friends are the same way. We are basically three girls in a group of mostly guys. I think its perfectly normal for some girls to just fit in with guys better.
@Jasmine -- "I've always thought it was just sad that she seemed to feel that she couldnt be a successful comedienne without doing some plastic surgery and breast augmentation."
ReplyDeleteSame here. I KNOW it's her choice to do what she wants with her body, but I'm pretty sure Carol Burnett did just fine without fake funbags and collagen injections.
@bnl1016 -- The only problem with what you just said is how you made a *lot* of generalizations.
First of all, men are DEFINITELY capable of being hyperdramatic. That is *not* a trait specific to women -- just certain attention-seeking people. There are plenty of women out there who are low-key and have no patience for overwrought emotional displays. And in *my* experience, the men I've worked with are guiltier of passive aggressive behavior and wounded egos than women. Virtually ALL the public altercations I've ever seen have been between two dudes. Also, in my experience, I've noticed how women are often able to let go of grudges easier than men. Again: this is what *I've* noticed. I'm not saying this applies to ALL men and women -- just certain people and specific dynamics.
"I have much more fun when my husband's friends come over and we watch football and drink beer or play cards."
As a beer lover, I can definitely attest that not all ladies enjoy big glasses of pinot gris. Gimme a Sierra Nevada ANYday. And I might not watch football, but I'm an athletic person. Also, my Grandma is THE BEST poker player I know. She holds games at her house and routinely cleans up. :-) Either way, it sounds as if you enjoy the company of your husband's friends because they sound like good people -- not *just* because they're dudes.
"I've never been a girly girl. I don't wear dresses, I don't spend hours getting ready to go out. I like sports, I can fix things myself, and I'm a college educated senior financial analyst."
Well, I'm with you there. I feel ridiculous in dresses, I own about two skirts, and I *never* spend more than twenty minutes getting ready. I don't own heels, a blowdryer, or eyeliner (and I wouldn't even know how to apply it, if I did). And PLENTY of women love sports, and are avid fans of football, basketball, soccer, etc. I'm also good at handling minor household repairs -- partly because I had a father who was intent on teaching me how to be a self-sufficient person.
And I will admit that you're probably a minority in your own field, but there are tons of women who are interested in and entering the world of finance. Women comprise over half the workforce in the U.S. right now, and as it's not as if we're limited to a few select occupations anymore.
I have a lot of male friends, and they're all amazing and evolved people who think highly of women. But I also love the company of my girls. I just feel as if there are certain topics they'll just *get* that my dude pals never, ever will.
@Ida Well, the reason I enjoy my husbands friends IS because they are guys. When I hang out with a group of girls and they start gossiping and being real catty I have nothing to say. I can gossip about celebrities until I die. Because they are public figures. But I won't gossip about people I know. The girls want to put on skirts and heels and go dancing or go shopping (which I hate) or go get manis and pedis (which I also don't do). The girls get very catty and petty very quickly and at any given moment at least two of them are fighting.
ReplyDeleteMen can be quite dramatic, but that's like you said, in your experience. In my experience men are like that at work. Or with men they don't know well or feel in competition with. When they are friends its a different dynamic and I haven't witnessed much drama in that area at all. A good example of this is how you so often hear of bridesmaids bickering during wedding planning, yet you rarely hear of drama coming from the groomsmen.
It also sounds like you are very lucky to know some great women because its been scientifically proven that women hold onto anger and resentment longer than men. Its not to say there aren't men that hold grudges, but for the most part they don't.
My job I didn't mean as a women. Our CFO is a woman, our controller is a women and 4 of 5 of our corporate accountants are women. I think that's been pretty diluted anymore. I just meant that I certainly wasn't vapid.
I've gone out on a limb twice actually in this past year and made friendships with two new girls and both of them stabbed me in the back. I've never been stabbed in the back by a man that I was platonic friends with.
Its just my preference. I've always gravitated towards men. In high school, in college and now. My point was just that with the way the world works today I don't think its uncommon at all for girls to fit in better with men. And I know some men - straight men - that prefer to have female friends. I just meant that I don't think the gender of friends you keep is indicative of your personality traits. i.e vapid, backstabbing, self loathing, etc.
I actually like Anna quite a bit. I think she's a very good comedic actress and she doesn't take herself too seriously on screen - which I find refreshing. Do I have that she injected and boobed herself up? Yeah. But I'll forgive her.
ReplyDeleteI loved her in Just Friends - her performance still cracks me up. House Bunny was okay. But I'm looking forward to her new movie.
I like slight physical comedy, which she does. It may not be everybody schtick, but variety is good.
@bnl1016 -- Oh, *you're* not vapid. That's obvious. I never meant to insinuate as much. I just have an instant reaction when I hear women say things like "I just don't like women -- too much drama." If a MAN were to say that, it would be a deeply offensive and sexist remark, but when a woman says it, I just find it sad. We've made progress, but there are still tons of barriers. I dunno. I get really cheesy when it comes to collective sisterhood and ladies supporting one another, because there really *are* situations that only WE truly understand.
ReplyDeleteI will say this: I think it's much harder for women to initially trust each other, whereas men are able to establish some sort of fratty Bro-Bond pretty quickly.
I switched schools many times growing up, and the first friends I made were, invariably, boys. Girls were the ones who tried to beat me up, called me names, teased me for being skinny, etc. During my childhood, I ran around my neighborhood with a pack of about six boys, and I only had one female friend (who was, and still is, a TOTAL tomboy, like myself). I was also raised primarily by my father, and my little brother and I are super close. I feel as if I DO just kinda naturally *get* the opposite sex, and the whole cliches associated with womenhood are perplexing to me. So, I understand much of what you're saying.
I can ALSO empathize with this:
"The girls want to put on skirts and heels and go dancing or go shopping (which I hate) or go get manis and pedis (which I also don't do). The girls get very catty and petty very quickly and at any given moment at least two of them are fighting."
I DO know women like that, and they are TOXIC and they are BORING. I don't blame you one bit for avoiding contact with people like that, but there are also good folks out there with XX chromosomes who are worthy company, and probably feel the same exact way you do. :-)
Bnl--I understand if you don't like hanging out with girls because you have nothing in common with them, and that being the reason why you don't have a lot of girlfriends. But saying that because women are "petty, catty, and bring all the drama" is the biggest bullshit reason I've ever heard. And the biggest generalization. You're just hanging with the wrong girls. Yes, many girls can be bitchy and catty, but not ALL. If ALL of the girls you encounter are bitchy and catty, well maybe you should think for a second and reflect on how you factor in with that. Because honestly, girls who always say that shit are usually the problem.
ReplyDelete^I just reread that, and it wasn't meant to sound accusatory. I didn't mean to come off that way. I'm jsut saying that I think that a girl who can't get along with ANY women at all should think about how they themselves interact with women instead of just saying "It's all them!"
ReplyDeleteTHANK YOU Jamee!
ReplyDeleteI think the shit Bnl is spewing is some of the most misogynistic sexist shit on the planet.
I HATE when women demean other women by saying their being too 'girly'. Uhhh, way to 10 steps backwards for the feminists, moron.
*take
ReplyDeleteThe toothpaste scene...omg, the toothpaste scene :) haha
ReplyDeleteI'm with Jasmine and Jamee. WTF. I get along very well with men and agree that women hold grudges a lot longer (myself included), but I also have a tight group of fabulous girlfriends who do NOT bring drama and I wear dresses nearly every damn day because they're comfortable. And I work in corporate finance and have a degree.
ReplyDeleteThere are vapid PEOPLE who bring drama everywhere, men included. Damn. My boyfriend has two male friends who are CONSTANTLY bringing drama and in trouble. I really do sense a misogynistic streak in the gross generalizations about women being catty and full of drama. I don't know who you're speaking for Bnl, but it ain't me.
Ok - I don't think I'm getting my point across because what you guys think I'm saying is not what I'm trying to say. The only person that is getting it is Ida and she's really the one I was talking to.
ReplyDeleteI never said ALL girls are the problem. As I've said before I'm outside of Philly. Lots of girls I come across are very "jersey shore". Not ALL, but lots because of my demographic area. It IS 100% just being exposed to the wrong girls. I said initially my two best friends in the world are girls and there are others I am friendly with as well. I never once said I don't have ANY girl friends. I just find that due to my personality and things I enjoy doing, I end up spending more time with my male friends. That's not to say I don't have a girls dinner sometimes. But for the most part I just fit in better with "the guys". My only point was, that doesn't make me vapid, backstabbing and self-loating as Ida initially said. And I clarified what I meant, she clarified what she meant and that's that. I didn't demean girls by saying they are "too girly". What I said was that's not me. If they want to go do that stuff what do I care? To each their own. But its not me so I don't participate in stuff like that but it doesn't automatically make me a certain kind of person because I don't.
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ReplyDeleteShe was highlarious in Waiting. I liked how she looked pre surgery, but to each their own etc.
ReplyDeleteI sing in a show chorus and it is just the type of all-female environment Ida is getting cheesy about. Supportive, positive, uplifting. But before I joined, I had a really hard time finding girlfriends here. The girls I met through my husband and his friends - well, I didn't dislike them per se, but we had NOTHING in common, and there was also a lot of drama that I didn't care for. With my husband's guy friends, it was different because we had a lot of similar interests, so I always felt more comfortable hanging out with them because we had stuff to talk about.
ReplyDeleteNow, back home, I have awesome ladies who I miss dearly and wish they would all move to Canada already! I've known most of them since high school (some longer) and we know each other so well - we can all just be silly and ridiculous together because there is noone to impress.
So for me, it's very much a situational thing. A lot of women are catty and dramatic, and I stay away from those. I also know a lot of guys who are incredibly threatened by intelligent women and constantly have to push their buttons and put them down - I stay away from those also.
Also; I enjoy makeup and curling my hair and painting my nails and shit. But I don't consider myself particularly girly!
ReplyDeleteAnna Faris in Just Frinds is absolutely hilarious. Between the brothers beating the crap out of each other and her Britney Spears parody - I watch it every time it's on the air. But it seems to me that since that film she just tries too hard to be that kind of wacky character. I haven't found her funny in anything since.
ReplyDeleteAnd Ida, my darling, the female gender can be a very harsh, shallow bunch. We can be catty, and hold grudges until the end of time. I find it a blessing to find good girlfriends. I have a habit of attracting a certain kind of friend whom I think would be a great friend, but then I find I spend too much time giving without getting anything back. (Both of those "friendships" were Leos, so I have a wary eye toward those women. Sorry.) I have been very fortunate to be a part of a great group of ballsy broads that I met on this very blog, and although I may never meet you face to face, I consider you dear, trusted girlfriends. You know what I mean, girl!
@mngoddess - "And Ida, my darling, the female gender can be a very harsh, shallow bunch. We can be catty, and hold grudges until the end of time."
ReplyDeleteUnlike men, you mean? And I LOVE Leo women. :-P
I think Enty is off on two things. Her husband may not be making millions of bucks, to be fair she is hardly an A list in your face actress/celeb, but he's on a hit show. Parks & Rec is emmy nominated & popular, and his character was definitely made bigger than when he started.
ReplyDeleteTwo. The Office Uk. "There's been a rape up there".
It was very funny if you've seen it.
Anna Farris seems nutty, like shes trying to hard to buy into the actress persona.
I really love Chris Pratt. His character on Parks & Rec is fantastic.
ReplyDeleteTo Ida, Jamee, bnl1016: I get what all of you are saying and maybe now I am making a generalization but I believe that as we grow older (women) we tend to have less drama, less issues with competition, less issues with our appearances. When I was younger I was totally hanging w/ and was considered one of the boys but as I have gotten older and more secure I find that I have some of the most amazing girlfriends who support each other and bring on the love and a much deeper, more intellectual spirit than when I was in my 20's and 30's.
ReplyDeleteIda, you can come to my house for a beer anyday..Loves me some Sierra!
@Sherry -- "as we grow older (women) we tend to have less drama, less issues with competition, less issues with our appearances."
ReplyDeleteGOD, that is SO true. I definitely think that it's easier to relate to other women when you hit your thirties and are more at ease with yourself -- or, maybe it's just easier to relate to ANYone once you get to be that age.
I've found myself *completely* unable to put up with bullshit sexism, too. When I was nineteen, I might have shrugged it off, but not anymore. The need to impress or appease the opposite sex has just *completely* evaporated.
I had a VERY strained relationship with my mother, never had any sisters, and didn't really seek out female friendships until I attended an all-female college. I hadn't ever really thought about my history with other women before I matriculated; I was pretty used to being the gangly, makeup-free, baseball-cap wearing girl who happened to hang out with a bunch of dudes. And two days into Orientation, I had already met the dozens of women who would become pals and confidantes (Golden Girls style) and basically soulmates.
I love my male friends, but when it comes to closeness, and what I'm willing to share, my girlfriends win the prize. Any. Damned. Day.
I have NO idea what led me to a single sex education, but I thank my lucky stars every day for the experience. It was the single best decision I ever made for myself. If you remove men from the equation, it's pretty amazing how quickly women develop intense confidence, and how readily they bolster and support each other's ambitions.
Oh, and send me your address. I'm coming over for some beer. :-)
Hmm, I went to an all girls' high school. On one hand, I loved the lack of competition for guys. On the other hand, I went to my 20th reunion a few years ago and it was pretty bad.
ReplyDeleteI could have said I cured AIDS, cancer, and brokered peace in the Middle East, but without kids and a husband, I might as well have not existed! I was divorced and childless at the time. This was not 1959, but 2009 too. I thought these adequate ideas had long been put to rest, but that was not the case.
One fellow classmate told me she thought I was a lesbian, because of my "intimidating manner." By the way, I was born and raised in San Francisco, CA. This was not the Bible belt.
I'm not a sporty woman. I hate sports, beer smells like vomit to me, and I married my best friend (male). I get may hands and feet done every two weeks.
All my closes friends have been male. I have female friends, but they are cyclical. I just don't feel as close to them as I do to men. I've had similar experiences as Bnl1016 with women. Women have betrayed me the worst. Even worse than ex-boyfriends.
I don't think I would be considered "vapid, backstabbing, or a self-loathing asshole," but someone who knows me may think otherwise.
My lack of female friends is based on my experiences with specific females. I've just had closer bonds with males than females. For whatever reasons, I have just been able to be closer to men than women emotionally.
I do agree that men can be passive-aggressive and catty too. Each person should be looked at on his or her individual merits.
@Bnl1016 - I'm glad you qualified your statement b/c I was about to say: I like ALL those things but I am NOT a fan of catty/mean girls or drama queens. I also wanted to add that I have worked in mostly male dominated industries and for me, the men were actually the WORST at the catty/gossipy behavior. I think it's situational and depends largely on the person. I have met equal amounts of nasty men/women.
ReplyDeleteAs for Anna Faris, I agree that Just Friends was great, the plastic surgery is bad and even though I do want to see her new movie, if I have to hear her "Borat" immitation on the trailer one more time i'm going to SCREAM.
@Lelaina - yes, what you like to do as a woman does not indicate whether or not you are catty and dramatic. JUST LIKE simply having more guy friends does not indicate you are vapid, backstabbing and self loathing.
ReplyDeletemy point was just that everyone is different so there are cases where women can be closer to men than women and that's just how the chips fell for them. i didn't think it was fair to automatically assume something about them based off that fact alone.
i also even said previously that yes AT WORK, men can be horrible. completely. but in my experiences outside of work the guys i know are different. i won't hang out with the guys i work with for that reason. and how my guy friends act at work, is their business.
@everyone in general - i think female bonding and all that is great, but i do think its something that not everyone just naturally gets out of life. similarly to how some people never get married. it doesnt mean there's anything wrong with someone for never getting married, they just never found that person. sometimes i think its equally as hard to find good friends. as i said, i have two best friends that i'll be friends with until i die. i love them to death and they know more about me than even my husband does. but i also subscribe to the idea that i'd rather have a few close friends you can depend on than a large group of acquaintances. so i'm not going to force female friendships just for the sake of having them. i myself am in my 30s. i have everything i need and am quite happy.
besides if I really didn't like women, i wouldn't be here. but i will say, i think the whole thing about being real quick to get nasty and start calling people names is unnecessary. everyone is entitled to their opinion. its ok for people to disagree. and sometimes you just have to agree to disagree. but when i'm saying that in my experiences women can be quite nasty and your come back is to belittle me and call me a moron you aren't really helping your case. that's what's so crazy to me. you want to portray how great women are and that we should be supportive of each other attaching another women, who you don't know anything about, is equally as horrible as what you are accusing me of doing. its just uncalled for. there are ways of getting your point across - which many others here did - without name calling.
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ReplyDeleteShe said she doesn't have female actress friends, not no female friends at all. She may have made some bad movie/surgery choices, but I still love her. And 10 times as much after seeing her on TMZ being an absolute angel to some fans. She hung out talking to them for a few minutes, and did the funny House Bunny voice.
ReplyDeleteWhat an interesting discussion to read, even though I am sorry that feelings were hurt (yeah, i realized the same second that I wrote it how incredibly cheesy it looked).
ReplyDeleteI, too, love having female AND male friends. I also couldnt say that there is a pattern I can see in them. Some of the guys like to drink wine and talk about feelings, some of the girls try to teach me sports while drinking whiskey.
That said, I too kind of flinch when I hear women who say they have NO female friends. That just rings a bell with me, and makes me wonder what their deal is.
Linnea said
ReplyDeleteI too kind of flinch when I hear women who say they have NO female friends. That just rings a bell with me, and makes me wonder what their deal is.
___________________________________
See I don't get that attitude. There are men who are mostly friends with women and no one bats an eye. Except maybe to think the guy could be gay. I think a lot of these ideas are a reflection of society's gender stereotypes. When I hear/read someone make comments like that and what Ida stated, they just reflect the commenter's limited experiences.
"See I don't get that attitude. There are men who are mostly friends with women and no one bats an eye. Except maybe to think the guy could be gay. I think a lot of these ideas are a reflection of society's gender stereotypes. When I hear/read someone make comments like that and what Ida stated, they just reflect the commenter's limited experiences."
ReplyDeleteBut there is a huge difference between mostly and none. If you have mostly male friends, or female friends, fine- but if you have NO friends of one gender or the other, that seems strange to me, like you have some kind of problem with 50% of the population.
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ReplyDelete@Henriette -- You basically just said that Linnea and I have limited mindsets because we *aren't* prejudiced against our own gender?
ReplyDeleteThat makes absolutely no sense.
I don't get it. Why not just befriend the fellow human beings whose company you enjoy the most, and keep gender assumptions and stereotypes out of it? Your wariness of other females just seems to indicate to me that you carry some obstinate opinions about ALL women that aren't necessarily true.
I personally find this thread ridiculous. What I was observing (even with beloved Ms Ida B.) was a TON of gender reinforcement stated under the binary oppositioned categories of gender we have instituted in our patriarchal Western cultures. People started saying shit like, well, I DO paint my nails and shop and blah blah blah and yet I like hanging with mostly men, cause woman are drama....THAT WAS SO FUCKING OVER THE TOP SEXIST I couldnt deal with it. All that came out was one gasp-moron- and I had to leave the thread. Why dont women understand that WE are fucking SET UP to view relationships, conversations, characteristics....all in black and white gendered stereotypes that favor the man. OF COURSE some women want to hang with men more, we are taught that men have the deeper, more impactful conversations, that their opinion and worth is more, that they are mentally and physically stronger and so forth...that blogger bnl or whatever (and trully even Ida) kept drawing lines in the sand of what constitutes female attributes and which ones they liked and alligned themselves with, and which ones were too 'girly' and putting masculine qualities above those. It was really nasty.
ReplyDeleteby the way, some people dont realize that by turning their backs on some of their perceived gendered qualities they associate with the female gender, they are simply reinforcing and heightening those roles as subservient to masculinity as well as showcasing the supposed 'difference' in male and females, when the reality is its all cultural, its all situational, and the true is NO ONE is all masculine or all feminine but a mixture of both, and if our society was more okay with that, some of you wouldnt feel the need to elaborate on which gendered roles you play, when you play them,and with whom.
ReplyDelete@jasmine u are putting words in my mouth completely. I said that I MYSELF and my personal experiences were what I based my opinions on. I drew no lines anywhere other than what I preferred. And when it comes to my personal relationships that's all that matters. I actually do not believe men have conversations that are deeper and more substantial and never said as much. I think men are quite capable of having ridiculously trivial and pointless convos all the time. I also do not believe masculine attributes are better than "girly" ones. All I said was that I myself prefer to play cards or watch sports with the guys than go shopping or clubbing with the girls. If I found girlfriends who would chill and watch sports with me or the like that'd be awesome. I just have not found them yet. I have girl friends. I hang out with them. But yes some stuff I pass on because it's not something I enjoy. And they understand that and have no problem with it. I think there are many girls like me as well. I understand your point of view but there is a way to go about expressing it with class. No matter how much you disagree you can't prove your point that girls are not catty and nasty by being catty and nasty. That just makes no sense. I would never stoop so low as to start tossing out insults simply because I disagreed with someone. My opinion doesn't carry anymore weight than the next persons.
ReplyDeleteAnd lastly. My original point is still being misconstrued. I don't believe anything is absolute. I hang with men and women. But I just find myself being with the men more. All I meant was that that did not make me automatically the things that Ida initially attributed to women that hang out with men more than women. I do agree if there's s girl that has absolutely ZERO girl friends it's a litte fishy. But that's not me.
ReplyDeleteSo my initial point was that women that do hang with men often shouldn't be stereotyped. And then stated MY PERSONAL experiences. I did not intend for that to come off as though I meant ALL women or ALL men. I was speaking for specifically my case. So to keep beating at me for being stereotypical when my initial point was to not stereotype women based off who they hang out with means my intentional point was lost long ago.
"that blogger bnl or whatever (and trully even Ida) kept drawing lines in the sand of what constitutes female attributes and which ones they liked and alligned themselves with, and which ones were too 'girly' and putting masculine qualities above those. It was really nasty."
ReplyDeleteJesus Christ. Just because I don't ascribe to cliched notions of femininity doesn't mean I am not proud of being a woman. Fuck off.
You know, I've finally come to the conclusion that there's no point in having "conversations" with people on the internet. I am absolutely fucking done. Smell you later, folks. Thanks for the ride, Enty.
Congrats, Jasmine. Many here on CDAN have tried to drive me away for good, and you're the one who's finally succeeded. Who knew you'd be the one? Sue Ellen, ea17, and countless other assholes are probably applauding your efforts.
Feel free to continue your sanctimonious dialogue in my absence.
I'm not surprised Ida has this reaction as I too almost had this reaction.
ReplyDeleteThe original debate was between Ida and I (not to say anyone else can't chime in) but as Ida and I debated, she understood me and I understood her, whether we agreed with it or not and she had even ended her last post towards me with a smiley face showing no bad blood simply because we disagreed. Why other people feel like they have to take it to a whole 'nother level and up the bitchiness is beyond me. Debate all you want, but do it like a mature adult.
And further more, don't be hypocritical. You can't argue against stereotyping by stereotyping. Which is what everyone here was doing. (I'm excluding Ida at this point from this for reasons stated above) Everyone was jumping on me for being stereotypical, etc. and that since I run with men obviously I am the problem and that's the reason. You are basically saying that any girls with more men friends must have something wrong with them. Which in itself is making an absolute judgement and not always the case. I'm sorry for those of you who don't approve of my choices of friends. I just don't think its far to not acknowledge that some women simply fit in better with men. Just as some men simply fit in better with women. Its all situational and comes down to their personalities and the personalities around them but I dont think its far to automatically say its sexist or stereotypical or there's something "wrong" with those people.
Furhtermore, the mere fact that someone who was arguing the SAME side as Ida ran her off shows point blank that you don't know how to debate and present your arguments with an ounce of dignity. Way to go.
Look, most of what I said last night regarding stereotypes that persistently marganalize women or re-create the binary cateogory of the men/women dichotomy...It may have had a few things from both of you but in all reality most of what I started going off on a tangent about was our problems as women in general. I'd just saw a 2 hr vid yesterday on female genital mutaliation, I'd just read a lengthy article on lots of gender differences that people see being there but that they are really not and its all cultural manifactured (includ the bit I added about conversations and the like) and I was all fired up about it, and it sort of took a mind of its own.
ReplyDeleteI dont think what i said was sanctimonious nor wrong, in the long run. But I do think, upon retrospect, that my frustration changed focus from the problem in general to this thread specfically and Im sorry if it came across as judgy or rude or misplaced.
Continue to have your conversation, I'll leave the thread in peace.
*had to DO with a few things from both of you
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