Amy Amy Amy
On Saturday when I heard Amy Winehouse joined the 27 Club, I was shocked. It is not like it was unexpected, but over the past year or so, I think everyone thought she was getting better. The only clue people had that she was not doing that great was that last concert performance, her subsequent cancellation of the tour and her quick entrance and exit to and from rehab. But she had been in and out of rehab before and she had done lots and lots of drugs and boozing in the past and been fine. So, when the news hit, I think it still took everyone by surprise.
Over the weekend, Russell Brand wrote her a letter and discussed his relationship with her. It is a pretty good read.
Her friends are saying she took a bad Ecstasy pill which combined with the booze and coke and ketamine she bought turned out to be a deadly combination. It is always the combinations that get you in the end. I wonder where her latest boyfriend is or was. Her ex, Blake, said he would miss her and that he is a mess without her. Considering he was a big part of her addiction and issues, I would appreciate it if he went back to his hole and shut up. A shrine is set up outside Amy's home and an autopsy will probably show she died from a variety of things and afflictions she already had.
52 comments:
When it comes to celebrities there are always 2 versions of the autopsy report. The sugar coated version that is given to the public, and the private not so sugar coated version that really went down. Not that it really is anyones business to get the real version. But I think we all draw our own conclusions regardless of what is released.
I always wondered if she was the HIV singer from the blinds.
I don't think it's a stretch to say that we all saw this coming; nonetheless, it's still such a shame. Living seemed to be such a struggle for her. I really hope she's at peace now.
I was actually surprised but not shocked. I thought she had been doing better. I would have bet Lilo would have been first.
Her Mom said when she saw her on Friday she knew that she would be dead soon so she must have been sick or something. Addiction is very sad. There is nothing you can do stop an addict and having fame & fortune can only make it worse.
She had a lot of talent and it's sad for any life to be cut short.
Odd but for the first time I think Scientology would have been a good thing for her, they would have been with her 24 hours a day keeping their CASH COW healthy and away from drugs and bad influences...
So very sad.
RIP Amy you're so talented
People forget too that years of abuse weakens bodies, so what they could stand a year ago ends up eventually killing - the same dose or combo. I am still so sad, so many tried to help her, including her record company who sent a doctor around every week. In the end others loved and cared about Amy more than Amy could love and care about herself and some how that makes it so sad to me. All the great music we should have enjoyed for decades to come now lost forever.
If you read Marty Rathbun's blog, Scientology isn't good for anyone but David Miscaviage and Tom Cruise. It's dangerous, violent, and even deadly.
I was surprised in that it's always a surprise when someone dies, but hardly shocked. She was never going to kick her habit(s).
What bothers me is all of these people in the British press wailing and moaning about how she was a "genius" and creating shrines to her. That pic of the two little girls with the poster of her is really disturbing. Amy Winehouse was not a genius. Was she talented? Hell, yes. But talent alone doesn't make you a genius. Everyone has different talents. That doesn't make everyone a genius. And to gnash your teeth for the photographers and say that she was an "angel" who was "too good for this world" is ridiculous. She was a junkie.
This is a teachable moment for those kids. Their parents should be telling them that Amy Winehouse wasted her life and her talents because of drugs. She shouldn't be revered. She should serve as a warning -- if you get involved in drugs, this is what can happen to you.
I know this comes off as harsh and unfeeling, but Amy Winehouse farked up her life and wasted the talents she had. Her parents now have to live with something no parent should have to go through. It's all a stupid waste.
I co sign with Texshan
Her body just quit after years of abuse, IMO.
what Texshan said
Texshan my friend...I do believe you hit the nail on the head.
Sad situation but not shocking in the least. She had been doing drugs and alcohol for a long time, it was only a matter of time before she succumbed to them. Whether she died by an overdose or because her body finally just gave out I hope she is finally able to be at peace now because while she was here she was too tormented by her addictions and demons.
As for Blake I will not bash the man because whether we liked him or not he did love her and she loved him. They had a tumultuous relationship that we may not have agreed with but it was their relationship. I know people are going to blame him for getting her hooked on the drugs and say this was his fault but at the end of the day all of this comes down to Amy and how she was unable to deal with her addiction.
Addiction is a hard and as much as she tried she was never able to kick the habit. Many can't. I know her family and friends tried to help her but an addict is going to do what they want and will only get better when they are ready. RIP Amy, you were a great talent.
you speak the truth, Texshan.
@Texshan
I agree with you!
Yeppers to Texshan.
she died as a result of addiction---whether it was drugs or alcohol. and she was never 'better' because she was never clean.
she may have drank a lot of alcohol and aspirated on her vomit---that happens all the time. booze kills you just as dead as drugs---it IS a drug.
the toxicology will tell the story. she'll either be found to have had a very high blood alcohol level, numerous drugs or all of the above. and i'm sure her liver and kidneys were absolutely shot from all the years of substance abuse.
this is the way this story was going to end---there was never really any doubt about it.
Winehouse was dead in the mind long before her body went to dust. And the death began when she was raised by parents who didn't provide her the love, confidence and discipline she needed to avoid the kind of self-loathing that leads to drug-induced death spirals. Talent, no matter how great, can't avoid the consequences of parental neglect and the unwillingness to break free from enablers.
It's an unfortunate death. But it holds a lesson for every parent: Teach your children well. And always give them hugs.
Thanks for the support - I thought for sure I'd get blasted for not making a martyr out of her.
The rumor was that she became addicted to drugs and alcohol to mask her pain and disbelief at becoming HIV positive, again that was the rumor and it was true, my sympathies go out to her and her family. Being an addict or a junkie for the hell of it is one thing, having a reason behind your addiction adds another level to it, IMO
Any body and mind can only take so much. There are limitations. At some point the drugs, or disease, or accidental damage, become too much and the body/mind cannot ever recover. It's one thing to try drugs. It's another to destroy your brain and body with drugs and this is why rehab is only a myth for many people. Their brains/bodies are too far damaged to ever recover. I suspect this is what happened to Amy. I knew a girl who became addicted to heroin. She eventually got clean but died of gangrene of the lungs a few years later. Her body just could not recover from all the drugs. Drugs have all kinds of chemicals in them, impossible to know unless you're a chemist and making them yourself. It's just sad this isn't better explained to children so they don't ever become addicted. RIP Amy.
Texshan, that was the conversation I had with my kids. I hope many others did as well.
Texshan, you are so right. I've always found it scary how celebrities who die from drug/alcohol overdoses or commit suicide become objects of reverence and almost worship for young people.
Call me a mean person, but I really don't care.
There are a lot of people that die everyday.
There are innocent people dying all over the world.
There are men/women dying to protect our freedoms.
She wasn't special. She didn't find the cure for anything. She was a person addicted to drugs.
Whatever
Awesome post Texshan.
I've seen reports that her downward spiral began when her grandmother died. It was the first major loss of her life and she just did not know how to handle grief. That might also be part of the reason she latched on to Blake so intensely, but who knows, all we can do is speculate and read the comments of others who are speculating. It's a shame that her talent is gone, but hopefully she will provide a lesson to somebody, somewhere. So sad...
I'm sorry for her and her family - she clearly had no peace in her life and she was extraordinarily talented. She and her talent will be missed by many.
No one's trying to make a martyr of Amy, but I've been pretty disgusted by a few posts on facebook saying we shouldn't give a shit because she was a junkie. Many of us have had family members who were junkies when they died - people don't choose that life. Amy was no Lohan (a narcissistic, thieving liar who denies her problems). By all accounts she was a sweet girl battling her own demons. RIP Amy.
RIP Amy. Well said Texshan and ITA RQ.
I read on another site that she'd been very depressed by her recent breakup w/ her last boyfriend but also read that all these people that lived in Camden said how much healthier/happier she'd looked recently. Very sad she could not kick those demons. :(
My best friend's coworker had a meth problem for many years. She finally got cleaned up and stayed that way for a few years, but unexpectedly died in her sleep - no drugs, just the effects of earlier abuse.
I was surprised how shocked and devastated I was to hear of Amy's death. She looked semi-healthy but I was struck how sad she looked in the last picture I saw of her, posted online Thursday, I think. I had always hoped she'd get cleaned up. She seemed like a decent person when not overcome by her addictions.
I loved Russell Brand's article, yesterday - it was compassionate and so spot on. I was the one who got the phone call about my brother, and had to tell my mom. He od'ed on drugs at 27 (I think that's the make it or break it age for many), but there was also a note in his wallet re: funeral arrangements, so I think it was suicide like my dad's.
Amy seemed so tired, and if you think about it, this was probably exactly the way she expected to go. If there is a place where souls go to rest, I hope she's there.
Once again, Enty, great minds think alike. All I could think when I heard the news was "Tears Dry On Their Own" and "Amy Amy Amy".
Agree 100% that it wasn't too shocking and she shouldn't be made into a martyr, but I was really sad when I found out. True, people die every day and she was far from perfect. It doesn't change the fact that her music meant a lot to me, as cheesy as it sounds.
Well said, RQ.
Touching story, MadLyb. Sorry for your losses.
Not everybody understands these people are more than "junkies", clearly.
I think we can do both things: look at her life as a warning sign and learn from it, as we should be reminded to do with so many others that have died from substance related deaths, and also, still be able to acknowledge her talent i.e. her song writing ability and her amazing voice.
I also am sick of people nitpicking the shit out of the comment about her being in the 27Club. Saying well she isnt in and neither is Kurt (which Ive heard a lot),its so lame. These collection of people who died at 27 all had loads of talent and all died way too fucking young and to play judge and jury and say who belongs in 'the club' and who doesnt seems wrong somehow.
p.s. Adele, the lovely British singer who sings Rolling in the Deep, released this statement on her blog today and I think it perfectly captures why mourning Amy for her she was rather than focus just on her substance abuse problems is so important:
"not many people have it in them to do something they love, simply because they love it. with no fuss and no compromise. but she knew what she was capable of and didn’t even need to try. if she wanted to do something she would and if she didn’t she’d say fuck off. it came easy to her and that’s why we all loved her so much. we believed every word she wrote, and it would sink in deep when she sang them. Amy paved the way for artists like me and made people excited about british music again whilst being fearlessly hilarious and blase about the whole thing. i don’t think she ever realised just how brilliant she was and how important she is, but that just makes her even more charming. although im incredibly sad about Amy passing im also reminded of how immensely proud of her i am as well. and grateful to be inspired by her. Amy flies in paradise xx"
russell brand's post has totally endeared me to him...this is so tragic and i can't begin to imagine the devastation and pain her loved ones are feeling...on top of all those years of helplessness and impotence at watching her down-spiral. while i don't believe she deserves 'legend' status, i do believe she was extremely talented...and it angers me b/c she chose to squander and despair of her gifts, when so many would give anything to have had her opportunities. while i believe there needs to be accountability here--and i believe blaaaake, in part, has blood on his hands--i also believe the situation and her family deserve compassion. this is a human life we're talking about...her addiction doesn't take away from the fact that she loved and was loved, that she was a daughter, a sister, etc. it's a damn shame and colossal heartbreak any way you slice it.
Blake is serviing a 32 month stint in jail for burglary. So there's that.
And the guy has a child and girlfriend. But claims that Amy is the love of his life and no love like theres could be matched or some bullshit like that. Nice smack to your girl and kid.
I'm sure he has his yellow pad out to write a tell-all for cash.
I wish I was able to write off a human life as useless because they had an addiction.
@Texshan - well said.
And after reading yesterday what Russell Brand said I will always have a little more respect for him.
I'm a member of NA and have been clean for almost 2 1/2 years. My husband on the other hand has really been struggling this past year after losing his mother a wee after his birthday. Addiction is an incredibly ugly disease that doesn't care if you are rich or poor, ugly or beautiful, smart or a little slow. It will take everything from you if you don't grab it by the balls on a daily basis and keep it in check. The husband and I were actually out getting the last of his stuff together to check him into rehab when we heard about Amy's death. It didn't surprise me at all, but it did make me very sad that she just couldn't shake her demons. I looked at my husband and just started crying and said "I sure hope this is the last time for you or else this is going to be you soon." May Amy rest in peace and may her family and true friends realize that there was nothing that they could do to stop this tragedy from happening.
Addiction is a disease. People are born with a predisposition towards getting this disease. Addicts are often cursed twice: first, by their own DNA, and second, by an erratic upbringing by their addict parents. Those who say that addicts caused their own deaths, or don't deserve to be grieved, must never have loved one of these unfortunate souls. I hope their luck continues. Life has a way of teaching you what you need to learn.
Well said Texshan.
((hugs)) MadLyb.
Just in case any of these last comments were directed at me, I want to say that no one is "just a junkie" or "useless," and I didn't mean to imply that she was. She was a human being and a much-loved daughter, sister and friend. She was also a great singer and songwriter. But her early and pointless death shouldn't obscure the fact that she could not get her shit together, despite countless chances. Her drug and alcohol issues killed her, one way or another. Her death holds important lessons for all of us. If you abuse drugs and alcohol, chances are you are not going to live a happy, fulfilled, lengthy life. Did she deserve to die? Of course not. But her lifestyle -- which she chose -- led to it. It's a damn waste. I don't mean to imply that she was useless or worthless. What I'm saying is she squandered her amazing good fortune by choosing drugs over everything else. Yes, I know that addiction is horrible. But it can be overcome with help, support, therapy and determination. I am sorry for her and her family that she was unable to do so.
I agree with what Adele said - Amy did turn British music back around and it empowered a lot of female singers (in a time of Coldplay and male dominated music). One of things that I love about the most recent Amy stories, is that despite her own career downward spiral, she was a presence in her god daughter's life and this girl will likely have a career because of Amy. She seemed to mentor her talent and give her a seal of approval, which counts for a lot in the business. For Amy to be on stage with her dancing and simply being present to celebrate this girl's performance says a lot. It was a gift and like Amy's own music, I think that's what I will remember. I agree with some of the points Texshan made but at the end of the day, Amy made something of her talents and she leaves a legacy. I hope to be able to say that same about my own life when it's my time.
Texshan - maybe you need to reread your "to kill a mockingbird"
until you've walked a mile in another man's shoes, maybe you should have more compassion and not be so quick to judge
Texshan - my comments weren't directed at you, but I do take issue with your wording of "chose" and "choice". Nobody chooses a life of addiction.
Bear, I thought I made it quite clear that I have a lot of compassion for Amy's family and and friends. And I'm not judging anyone -- I'm merely stating facts. I didn't say Amy was a horrible person because she did drugs. I don't think she was. Addiction is a horrible thing, and I wish with all my heart that she could have beaten it.
Perhaps YOU should go back and read everything I wrote before being so quick to pass judgment on ME.
RQ, I think we have to agree to disagree on that. I'm not saying it's an easy choice, or even feels like a choice, but when it comes right down to it, no one forced Amy to take drugs. I know - firsthand - that when you are in the grips of a horrible addiction, not giving in can seem impossible. But it IS possible. That's why it is a choice. Amy had resources available to her that many other addicts can only dream about if she had really, really wanted to quit. She chose not to take advantage of them. And I'm not talking about the repeated half-assed attempts at rehab.
I've seen a lot of just plain mean comments, not here but elsewhere. The thing is if she wasn't a singer, famous, or someone who was really talented then there would be no point in the media talking about her. She would be just another loved one lost to disease misunderstood by a lot of people. It's not strange to see why the media and others are focusing on her talent.
All addicts have loved ones who love them just as much as we love are family and friends. It reminds me of watching a 20/20 special last week about parents who have kids with schizophrenia and one of the couples was walking down the street they walked right by an older man with dirty clothes, hair, looked homeless and he was just shouting things. It was very sad to see them process that someday that could be their daughter.
Yes, Texshan, I guess we will have to agree to disagree. It's true that the first or second time, using those drugs is a choice. But as others have mentioned, a family history, mental issues and other environmental factors all contribute to a raging addiction. It is that raging addiction that is not a choice. Many of us have first-hand experience as well, I lost my father to it. And I know that is not the life he would have chosen, if he'd been physically or emotionally capable.
Speaking from firsthand experience addiction may start out as a choice but usually it's to mask some feeling (pain, grief, fear etc) & then it becomes out of control & before u realize what's happening ur physically addicted & can't just stop.
In the beginning an addict is making an unconscious choice to do drugs but soon it becomes a vicious cycle of doing drugs or being sick.
Of course Amy went & failed at rehab many times, but 2 things need to be remembered 1) a person has got to want to change 2) when that person does go to rehab they have to deal with whatever feelings they were trying to bury in the first place or it's going to be too much & they will start using again
I went through 3 programs when I realized things were out of control before I found 1 that worked for me & believe me it wasn't for lack of wanting to change.
People who talk about her just being another statistical junkie have no idea about addiction other than what movies & tv shows portray. She was a person who had demons within that were too powerful for her to cope with & that's sad.
Texshan - I completely agree with everything you said.
Yes, it's very sad that a talented young woman lost her life due to an addiction but I agree that there were choices involved. The young teens murdered in Norway had no choice in what happened to them, nor do the people facing famine in Somalia. It drives me nuts that Amy Whinehouse's death is somehow more newsworthy because she was famous.
I have been surrounded by addiction my entire life and while I completely agree that it's a disease, I also believe that people have a choice to seek help. Of course that usually means addressing those issues that played a part in the addiction but that is a better option than slowly killing yourself. I also realize that many times addicts don't seek help out of fear of having to address those issues, but again that's better than a person living such a miserable existence. It's the same with obesity. There's almost always an underlying problem but most of us would still expect someone to continue to seek help until they got well. We wouldn't assume that because it's a disease that it's hopeless and inevitable that the person is going to eat themselves to death.To say there's no choice means ignoring all of those people who struggle every day to maintain their sobriety.
Personally speaking as the daughter of an alcoholic and a drug addict, I've had to make the choice to avoid drugs in any form. It hasn't always been easy (that's a huge understatement!! Lol) but these substances caused me to have a pretty sh*t childhood, so it's a cycle that I am choosing to end.
I am not judging Amy and I wouldn't judge any addict because I would hate for someone to do that to the people in my life. However, when someone has access to many more resources and support services than most alcoholics and drug addicts could ever hope for, my sympathy can only go so far. I do feel very sorry for her family and friends. What most people don't realize is that we bear a lot of the burden of addiction and maybe that's why sometimes anger replaces sadness. I pray that I am never in her family's shoes.
I do hope that she's found peace and maybe her unfortunate death will help someone struggling with addiction to get the help the need.
*they need
Texshan, I agree with all your posts in this thread.
People cannot become addicted to drugs if they never start using them.
I'm another person whose (negative) opinion regarding Russell Brand changed after reading his post.
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